A New Habit

Habits an routines can change your life.   First it takes doing inventory of our worst habits. If we are habitually late, or we fritter our money away, or watch a lot of television instead of making the time for a walk, or we are night owls an get little sleep, or we isolate ourselves, or we are disorganized. So many “OR” s.   The one I am working on is personal organization. I have experienced the sad results of being a catastrophic mess. Why do I have piles everywhere? Why can’t I find anything? When people come over I feel I am seeing my home for the first time an it is a mess. 

Habits an routines can change your life.  Having admitted my shortcoming I then prayed to Jehovah to help me to be aware of my actions because I never understood where the messes came from.  After this I caught myself dropping my things on the table after moving what was there to the side. No wonder our table is always so piled up.

Now, when I have something in my hand I strive to put it away. It takes less then ten seconds an at most less then a minute to put things away. Although I still have clutter, I am no longer contributing to the mess. Slowly my enviroment is improving. The conclusion I have come to is that the best decor is an organized and clean one.

Fabulous living requires good habits and routines. Let me encourage you to analyze your life an see where you might  make a healthful change to your life.

no justification needed, whether to stay the size I am or to choose to lose a few. It is Personal

Worry about weight, some worry all the time, others feel they are doing us a favor to bring it up to us.  Treating us like we are fat, and saying the kinds of things that are said to a fat person by a concerned family member. The intentions may be good, but the intentions fuel the fire of obecity.  Recently instead of just asking me to hand the whoopee pies from the bag in the back of the car to him.  My dear son said “You ate both my whoopee pies didn’t you?”  That made me feel like eating the two whoopee pies.  I kindly handed up his two pies.  Having that assumption fired off at me was painful.  I feel bad for anyone whom friends or family members talk to them in a negative manner.  How we talk to others affects how they feel about themselves.  Those suffering with weight challenges need encouragement.  Showing faith in anyone that is trying to improve their situation is a gift of endorsement.

Justify, why bother.  I choose to lose about ten pounds.  Small goals are doable and lead to the accomplishment of the bigger goals.

When you do not feel good, how can being fabulous help?

Having Chronic Illness due to rhummatoid Arthuritis, Lupus, Diabetes and many other conditions out of my control, can really get me down.  Going from the bed to the couch, and from the couch to the bed, while in incredible pain was my day.  Today’s blog will be short due to the swelling in my fingers and pain in the wrists.

My husband and sons have become more understanding over the years.  It is at the point where I have large spills or breaks or burns each day.  Yesterday with friends, my coffee went all over, and poured into my lap and down to the floor.  Everyone was nice wiping it up.  It happened in the car later that day.  Today, my coffee flipped and went all over the lovely couch.  Do I need a baby sippy cup.  It is aggravating.  When it was time to take the roasted chicken out of the oven my husband kindly did take it out.  Much easier than dealing with me getting a burn.  I love to cook our meal, acknowledging my limitations requires that I ask for help.

All I could do is rest because that is what I needed to do.  What was fabulous, I decided to watch Legally Blonde with Reese Witherspoon in it.  Her own attitude and tenaciousness despite opposition is Fabulous.  Great example.

Haunted by memories of my thinner self.

Until my young thirties, I was painfully thin and could not gain a pound.  When I was presented with a video of my wedding shower, I was so ashamed of my overly thin arms, that I threw the video away.  Now, as I approach fifty I deeply regret that action of throwing the video away and the feelings that fueled it.  My arms have been shamefully fat for a couple decades.  I would love to look at the video and say, “see, I really was thin…” because I have been ashamed of my fat arms.  Never approving of self, fat or thin, is a common thing with women.

Last month I was in the ministry with my friend a young mother and her baby.  I was wearing a sleeveless top and sitting next to her son a three year old.  He put his hand on my arm and said “Cold”.  Suddenly, he became a koala bear and totally wrapped around my arm.  It was a very delightful and amusing experience.  My friend said, “He loves touching woman’s arms”.  This is the first time I felt good about my good fat arms.

Back to the video, and haunting memories of better days gone by.  It is so easy to feel that those days were better.  Yet, when we consider the whole picture, we might discover we did not truly feel better about ourselves then.  If we are haunting ourselves, tormenting ourselves with the better selves gone by.  It is time to renegotiate our view, for example:  I look forward to being thin again, but I do not want to be as thin as I was in my teens.  These arms have performed many tasks over the years as I worked, and raised three sons.  It is great that my arms will reflect strength and suppleness which reflects my character.  Life’s challenges causes us to earn such as we strive to be responsible with all our obligations.

Do not throw the video away, or reject the memories.  Yet, we never want to unrealistically worship what can never healthfully be attained.  It can be defeating.  Keep it inspiring.  I believe I am going to do a few 2 lb bicep curls.

How can I be Fat an Fabulous?

How can you be fat an fabulous?  Yes, you guessed it. I like oxymorons.   A couple years ago I went without make up a couple years an didn’t comb my hair for days. Ashamed of being overweight, dealing with chronic illness, I felt insignificant,  I felt I had nothing to be proud of. One day I was having lunch with my friend an although we weigh about the same I noticed she really is fabulous. Her hair is always done nice, she dressed lovely an has fantastic posture.  Olivia leads a fabulous life, she is a good friend  to many, she loves clothes, she knits, sews, crochet, gardens an enjoys the ministry. Being fabulous is living fabulous each day. Side note. Olivia has lost some weight an she has been keeping a regular exercise routine for a few months. She is inspiring an she is fabulous.  She no longer qualifies as a fat person.

Three ways to improve our life.

1.  Acknowledge we are not in control of people. We are not in control of all situations, there are too many variables.

2. Identify the many areas of our life we are in control of.  We are only in control of our actions.  Being honorable, honest, and obeying the laws bring good results.  These are things we are in control of.

3.  Responsible decisions and behaviors bring fabulous results.

When bad things happen, relationships that reflect unhealthy attitudes, job loss, abuse, it is good to reflect on what is in our control, what we will accept, what can we change, and how we can be honorable in all our actions.  If a good relationship is ruined because of lying or cheating, why would we expect another to put up with that.  We shouldn’t put up with that either.   If we lose a job because we fuss with our cell phones instead of focusing on our productivity, then it is time to learn to leave our cell phones turned off until break time.  Or if we are habitually late we put our employment at risk.  If our mate is jealous, we have to listen to complaints they might have voiced, “your always texting others”,  “when we go out to eat, your always looking at your phone”  This could breed insecurity, and in some situations it is very rude.  We must consider our own attitudes and behaviors.  There is no excuse for abuse, nor do we want to instigate a situation with our own actions.  Many problems in life can be avoided if we exercise manners, consideration, and honesty.

In control in an out of control world

Many have suffered because we live in a world where bad happens.   So many are plagued with Depression for a variety of reasons.  Post traumatic stress is a very real condition. There is the medically induced depression because of health problems or a recent surgery.  There is depression as a side effect of medication.  There is mental illness. The post-pardem depression that affects a woman after having a baby which can involve hormones and thought process.  There is a situational or circumstantial type of depression brought on by the loss of a job or relationship.  All the different types of depression and so many more types exist than I am able to mention.

The one thing many depressions have in common is the feeling of loss of control or the inability to control.  It is difficult to view the future with optimism.

A few things can help Develop a positive outlook.

1.  Positive affirmations:  Saying a positive statement a few times a day for about forty days, even praying about it.  Example:  There is good in my life.  Say this a few times a day.  Ask Jehovah to help you to see and acknowledge good in our life.  Before you know it, you will be thanking Jehovah for the good in your life.

2.  Start a small project and imagine the finished product.  Putting a puzzle together, or learning a new craft, or picking up an undone project and finishing it, or going to the senior citizens center and ask if you can join their group. (They have many groups and classes, playing pool, crochet, day trips to museums etc., painting groups).  When my sons were small I would ask to be in the senior citizen painting class and bring my sons.  Although I am not and was not a senior they allowed us to come.  In many cities and states I have done this.  One group had men playing pool while we were painting and they invited my sons whom were teenagers homeschooling to come out and play pool with them, and the boys learned a lot from them and had a great time.

3.  Plant a seed and watch it grow.  It gives you something to look forward to.  Our friend Paul whom is home bound due to chronic illness put in some special lights and he has trays he starts tomatoes, peppers, and lettuce plants in.  He grows these, and he shares them with others.  Having a garden is great for a positive outlook.  Last year I read an article in Architectural Digest about Bette Midler and how she instituted a roof top garden program for people living in the high rises where direct sunlight cannot get into their homes.  I no longer have the article, but if you can find it you will be very encouraged by her efforts and the benefits so many have been enjoying.  I felt very proud of Bette for doing this.

4.  Daily Exercise:  If a person is able to get some exercise daily, it releases endorphins and helps both your body and mind.  Taking a walk on your lunch hour, or going up and down some stairs a few times, or joining a class, or doing the 6:30 a.m. PBS exercise show in the mornings is a great way to invest in yourself.  Most libraries have a video rental section and you can rent an exercise video.  Otherwise, just doing a few stretches and isometric exercises can get your blood flowing.  Oxygen to the brain lifts the spirits.

There is so much not in our control, and there are some things in our control.  By learning a few beneficial things we can do, our outlook may become more optimistic.  Practicing a few things in our daily life will bring on a living attitude.  It can contribute to a better view of ourselves and even change how others view us.  Our conversations can be more interesting to others, because we are more engaging.  With our interests being cultivated, we have more to talk about.  When we isolate ourselves and get so depressed, it is difficult to have conversation that is positive.  Because we are creating a broader field of interests we may meet more people, make some friends, and have much to share.

Hello world!

After years of filling notebooks, I was encouraged to just write, and publicize.  Eventually, when I do publish the book Fat, Fit and Fabulous I will have to get an editor.  Yet, in the meantime, I feel there is so much we can accomplish together.  Most people want to improve their lives, make adjustments, make decisions, and to feel better about themselves.  The goal of Fat, Fit, and Fab is to support and encourage just one person or many to stick with the changes in behavior and actions that will help them to succeed.  As I make some serious adjustments in my own life, it is wonderful having your support as well.

I have heard from a few people whom really appreciate my approach to the subjects I present.  I would like to say, I am not a doctor, or of the mental health field.  I am what you could consider a long distant friend offering support.  Every person has a unique situation and I do not have any special insights.  It is my prayer that what I present can help you to feel fabulous about what you can achieve through application of healthy habits and honorable decisions.