Luxurious Living

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Living in the Lap of luxury was a common phrase generations ago.  Is this something people do?  Is this truly prosperous and satisfying?  How can we live in a prosperous and satisfying manner?  We will seek to answer these questions.  The answers may make a positive change in a person’s life.  Please consider…

Throughout history man has been in search of more.  Some whom have a lot want more.  Some whom have little are satisfied and why?  There are always times of plenty and times of famine.

Think of times when food was rationed, could it happen again?  Is it always some far off place?  If a person has plenty, why should they worry about this?

In some places in the world a person can go buy what they want or think they need.    Getting the vehicles, homes, clothes, beauty treatments, vacations, etc…and fritter money here and there without much thought .  Then they do more, buy more, and more is never enough, not recognizing situations change.  The money may not always be there.  Most people do not feel the need to worry about it.  But should we consider our circumstances?

We never expected our situation to change so dramatically.  It can change on a dime is also an old phrase.  I personally know this is true.  Our situation has changed.  I wish I had thought about all this sooner.

Personally I have never been into the beauty treatments and getting nails done. I kinda like being a plain Gina.  It is Good not having to worry about being a diva or beauty queen.  Being ordinary takes the pressure off.  I get my hair trimmed or cut twice a year and trim it the rest of the time myself.  My hair is a blaa blond, and when I am outside it brightens up some.  I dream of cutting it a shoulder length and dying it a dark red.  The only deterrent is being a slave to roots.  I do not do well with chemicals so I just continue as it is anyway.

Doing my own fingernails and eyebrows helps too.  I wouldn’t win any awards for the outcome.

I do not smoke or gamble and rarely have a glass of wine so that really cuts down on expenditure.  Imagine the money that literally goes up in smoke for some.  My mother spent so much money on her cigarettes when I was growing up.  One time when I was a young teenage girl I figured out how much she spent in a month on her cigarettes and I mentioned this to her.  She hauled off and slapped my face.  I never figured out whom was in the wrong with that one.  I just remember her being on the phone saying she needed money for the power bill.

I use to love going to thrift stores and yard sales.  But it really cost me a lot of money and I was dragging stuff in the house.  I had to put a stop on that.

Do you like clothes?  I love clothes and shoes.  I fall in love with clothes all the time and I always see the need.  Yet, my closets are bursting at the seams.  If I got rid of some of the less best garments I might be one of the best dressed women of our generation.  What generation?  This one of luxuriant living is what I refer to.

We love eating out, yet, we have cut back on this.  We still do eat out sometimes.  It costs so much more than it use to.  Like a days wages if you think about it.  Something else to consider: It is just, when I was young, the tips for your server were usually 10%, then later it went up to 15%, then 18%, now it is 20%.  Sometimes the tip is so big it is like paying for another meal, for the invisible person. It is almost painful.  The knowledge that the waiter may be emotionally hurt if they do not get the 20% is something that keeps us pigeonholed into this.  They really rely on this income.   The other problem is that they may not even receive all of their tip if paid w a credit card depending on the establishment.  How can I support this big game when the cost of the meal could really buy a couple bags of groceries or fill a gas tank?  What is balance?  That, each man or woman or family must figure out.  Try looking at a month, compare to another month.  Start keeping track.  This does not mean we cannot go out to eat.  Just, how often…might be considered.

Junk food,  what is that?  It happens to us, going to the store hungry, our cart is always fuller.  A drive thru happy meal would be more economical.

Just the requirements of daily life have snuck up in costs.  And it seems what previously was considered a luxury decades ago, cable tv, Internet, cell phones, not everyone had them.  We always seemed to be the last to get them.  The latest, the greatest, and speed seem to be a factor.

The utility bills have come up and take out a chunk of change.

I feel bad for many children being raised to think that this is normal.  They are unhappy always wanting more, always wanting newer, competing with their peers.  The status symbol, and their esteems are built on a slippery slope.  Parents are begged and bullied into getting their children expensive phones etc.   The assumptions by children that they can expect their parents to provide all this and so much more.  Most cannot afford but quietly, stressfully, helplessly go along which creates unrealistic expectations.

We are truly trapped it seems.  Can we say No!!!.?   Where are the boundaries?  Can adjustments be made?  How can I create satisfying boundaries in my life?

In high school we had an Independant Living class.  We looked at a potential monthly budget based on a basic wage.  Then we subtracted the rent for home, the utilities and insurances, and fuel, then we knew what we had for groceries.  We then could see what was left and we put a percentage of that in a savings account.

The times we live in are really more expensive when we add it up.

Remember a game of chess, or a board game and the fun we had.  How about the woodworking, sewing, knitting, embroidery, cooking and baking?  A hobby was very satisfying and earned you a real esteem.  A child proud of a picture they drew is a real event.  Sadly, many are more proud of their scores playing their games on their phone.

People have many vices in search of something, it breaks up families, and leaves people broke and depleted.

Slow down, calm down, recollect, reconnect, reconsider, appreciate, make new boundaries, stress less, be satisfied sooner, reassess needs.  Save yourself, save your family.  Hebrews 13:5,6 says:  Let your way of life be free of the love of money, while you are content with the present things.  For he has said: “I will never leave you, and I will never abandon you.”  So that we may be of good courage and say:”Jehovah is my helper; I will not be afraid… “  please read the whole chapter of Hebrews 13. It shows us how we can live a better life.

Changing things up here financially is helping. Yet, it has not been soon enough.  We still feel the stress of the heavy load we unwittingly created.  The scriptures admonish us to “live within our means”.  Inflated needs which are built on an imaginary lifestyle.  Needs the world around us makes us believe are normal.  The scriptures talk about us being satisfied with our daily needs being met.  Figuring this out can be a rewarding challenge.  In the last three years I have quit using three department store credit cards.  Three other credit cards I no longer use.  I am down to two credit cards and I am working on using them less.  It really is making me happy.  It still seems our credit/debt/income ratio is off balance.  This makes me really uncomfortable.  When we consider what this really is and how this affects so many aspects of our lives, it is rewarding to make an adjustment.  We still have a long way to go and more adjustments to make.  It seemed we were blind to boundaries we should have had.  And financial situations change in many ways, the world scene, the country we might live in, the income, health,  living expenses, job security, all are temporary.

How often do you say no to yourself?.   I do not say no as often as I like but I do say no more often than I use to.  It feels good.  A small measure of control.

Luxurious living is living within our means while having joyful interactions with those we love.  Cooking together, going to the park, enjoying creation, gardening, building something or sewing a garment are also rewarding activities.  Really living a life with a positive outcome in view.

Written by:  Gina Rydin  (the photo is a dinner my husband and I prepared together, leftover spaghetti baked, sautéed asperity Gus   And avacado)  that was a nice luxurious evening.

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Loser! Or Winner? How are you labeled, do you label yourself?

How do you label yourself?  How do others label you?  Should we label ourselves or others with such expectations?  Either we expect too much or we expect the worst.

Growing up, it seems we are labeled at birth to be or not to be.  My natural mother attempted to abort me twice via home methods, and obviously was a failure.  As the welfare department knew before my birth they would have me, there were the worst of expectations.  I was instantly labeled unadoptable.  In my records it states I would have many defects and would always be an expense for the department.

Growing up, there were many surprises, that I was good at structural things, creative things, math, etc.  While I was continually reminded that I was not like others, and I was not capable.   To have goals or plans for the future I was setting myself up for disappointment.

There were health problems, yet, I was a lovely little child wanting love, affection, security and praise.  The foster family whom had me since three weeks of age finally got approval to adopt me.  It was really dad whom wanted me.  I was three an a half when Dad left an moved many states away.  At three an a half, I was very saddened when he just disappeared.  Only finding out this year that he left because she was so violent to the children, including me.  Therefore, I did not feel loved, wanted, secure, or praised.

This is not such a sad tale as it appears.  My teachers really made a difference.  Mother would tell them bla, bla, bla, and I was not capable.  Then the teachers would tell her good about me, and she could not deal with it.  When I was delighten from the rewards of achievements, and the praise of teachers, she happily knocked it out of me later.  But can you really knock it out of a person?

Unsavory people in our lives may not be comfortable with our small or large successes.  What is really wrong with them?  Do we have to be underahievers or flawed for others to feel right or superior?   Some are controlling beasts that have those expectations.

Whether it is the family dynamics that keep us in our place, a mate, or friendship.  Example:   “She is the lovely one an I am the fat one”. ” She is organized an I am the messup”.  Does the apparrent winner need a few losers in their life so they can bask in the position they have placed themselves in.  An aquaintance came over an spent a couple hours talking continously about all her achievements.  I praised her as I was very impressed with her hunting, fishing, an outdoor activities.  Finally later I mentioned that I sew some, an I showed her my most unorganized yet interesting workroom  with projects on maniquins an forms.  She was looking, seemingly impressed, then she suddenly said self assaulting words an phrases such as, “I am so dumb, I do not  know how to do that. I am so stupid an useless, …” About herself.  The discomfort caused me to feel regret showing her.  It appeared to me that if she was the only capable one at anything she was happy in this belief, but she couldn’t stand us both being capable.  This would be an unhealthy relationship if I let it develop.

Friends an loved ones support each other as we make decisions that better our lives or persons.  If you start getting daily exercize an get in better shape an become healthier, family members an friends are happy for you.  Or you start keeping your car really clean an clean up your home, these are positive changes you an those whom love you can appreciate.  You do not have to be the “fat one”, “lazy one”, “messy one”, “shy one”, we can make the adjustments to be whatever we want to be.

There are people in our lives that are superior at many things, we can almost feel inferior if we are not careful.  It is a bad habit to look at others an try to determine whom is a loser an whom is a winner.  We might even do it to our own children an label them.  We inhibit others when we put expectations on them.  Some have others expecting too much an then they get involved with all sorts of downfalls because they could not take the pressure of perfectionism and too high expectations.

Some do not expect enough of themselves an their life performance in such important areas as relationships, work, health an fitness, personal organization an habits, an money, they do fail.  This can be because of a lack of parental training, low esteem, or healthy habits.

The point of this article is that no one knows you like our Great Creator Jehovah and his son.  We can make adjustments in our life, habits, thoughts and attitudes.  It takes so long to truly know another, and never completely so.  We are a mystery to ourselves.  Imagine your better self, and then determine what is the next action to take to meet that change.  Finishing what I start fearlessly is what I am working on.  I am enjoying the rewards of that.

 

Another Year Gone By. Happy Prospects Despite:

There is so much is happening in this world, some things are frightening and depressing.  Many are personally touched by tragedy.  Yet, we have a life to live.  As long as we are alive we have a responsibility to be happy.  Some get happiness mixed up with selfishness or me ism.  It is not the same.

If we have a roof over our head, a bed to sleep in, and our basic necessities met, we have a lot to appreciate.  I am not going to depress you with facts and figures about all those whom do not have their basic needs met.  More people than you think have experienced homelessness or other sad situations.  What I would like to suggest is that we can afford to feel a measure of contentment and appreciation.  Contentment and appreciation are Happiness manufactures.  If a person only wants more and they do not see the good in their life with great appreciation, they will never be happy.  When our sons were small and life was so difficult and there was no money to pay the power bill, I still told the boys we were richer than most.  We were.

Another Happiness factor is quit looking elsewhere for what you may already have.  Invest in your mate, children, home, job, and community.  Some are not happy with their mate, what happens then.  Children grow up emotionally detached if we do not regularly communicate with them.  They can become vulnerable because of feeling unloved and lonely.  Everyday, our mates and children need us to Stop!  Look! and Listen!

What would you like to accomplish in the next quarter, 1/2 year point, third quarter?  This first quarter we definitely can start early figuring out our taxes.  An exercise routine is good to get busy with.  This next quarter I want to get some household decorative issues taken care of, finish painting, get some wood work done.

Having a schedule, and quarterly goals keeps me inspired and optimistic.  You cannot be happy if you do not have hope.  There is so much in life we have no power to control.  It is critical that we have short terms goals and long term goals.  Every day consider what step you can take to work toward the accomplishment of your goal.  A short term/longterm goal I have is the practice of productivity in my sewing and painting areas.  I am eager to get more productivity and results regulary.

Productivity restores a sense of well being to the mind.  If a person is layed off, retired, or disabled, productivity is still a necessity.  Some suffer with depression, the loss of employment or an ongoing sad situation can get us down.  Keeping a domestic schedule with some social activities keeps one from isolating themselves.  Productivity causes one to feel accomplished.  Even something as simple as cleaning out one drawer in the kitchen and organizing it gives me pleasure.  Cleaning and organizing a shelf a night in the pantry or the refrigerator creates good feelings.

Assessing responsibilities, and fulfilling them, benefits all.

Considering the application of some of these behaviors, attitudes and habits can cause you, me, and our loved ones to feel happiness.  I desire that as you proceed into this new year that some of your hopes, and goals are fulfilled.                       Gina

 

 

 

November, only Four weeks long, what will we do with our time ….

November, so much to consider.  Seasons changing, time changing, attire changing, does anything stay the same?

Some things are good to keep the same, it is nice to be able to depend on a few things.  Five Sundays and five Mondays, do not be blue about Mondays.  We have five Sundays to catch up on rest, or chores, or projects.  Mondays are known as the start of things, what can we start?

Before it gets too late into the month we can call family members an see how they are doing.  Make time to visit long distant family members or send a card.  Has there been an estrangement?  Forget the issue, there are many reasons why, and they are not important as the years fly by.  Things can be misrepresented, misunderstood, misadvised, and just totally misdone.  Likely all feel sorry.  Yet, all miss out when there is an estrangement.  Reach out, remember the good, heal the breach, reconcile.  My ex father in law called Sunday and it has been years, I did not even recognize his voice until he laughed.  Nice visit on the phone.

Movies at this time of year are all so inspiring regarding spread the love, be kind to strangers, etc.  Love your neighbors, love your family and love strangers, put it into action.  Yet, be safe, do not be unwise.  People experience all sorts of fraud at this time of year because they want to be “good deed doers..”  as said on Wizard of Oz.  We can be responsible humans, considerate to fellowman, and if we consider ourselves Christian than Be that Christian the scriptures describe regarding the New Personality.  My father said, “Be what you say.”  His 7th grade education was weightier than an expert in a said field.  If you feel you are honest, then be honest, if you feel you are moral, than be moral.  If you feel you are loving, be loving.

Think of a goal, such as consider your prime responsibilities in life, are you a Husband, Wife, Father or Mother?  Consider how you can be better at that.  It is easy to assume we have it down pat and there is no need for improvement, but there is always room for improvement.  All can be more loving, more helpful, express love more often and show appreciation.  Help out with the expenses by not being so expensive to maintain.  Contribute more to the household by doing chores to help your mate with what they would normally do.  If there is more than one, than one alone should not be fixing the meals and doing the cleanup.  Help, do something, help with the dishes, or sweep or clean the bathroom.  Surprise your loved one with an unexpected card or a small gift, or meet them for lunch.  I met my son for lunch and we only arranged it an hour before.  It was so nice spending time with him at a restaurant close by his work.  He will be 23 this month and I cannot believe my middle son has grown to be such a wonderful adult.

My goal for November is to improve my part of all relationships I value.  Allot can happen in November, you can warm up your life.  “Be what you say!”