PLAN IT, BY GOLLEY DO IT!

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Cowl neck scarf I finished knitting which matches my $1.00 skirt an my cute shoes.  Gina  fatfitanfab.com

Plan! Plan! An replan.  Are we more distracted than previous generations?  Are we less productive than previous generations?  I would venture to say yes, although, it is a general conclusion not based on any statistics.  Are you as productive as you like?

Personally, I feel totally sidelimed by a lack of awareness of time.  Then one gets caught up with their cellphone looking at messages an emails etc.  Time is lost an nothing to show for it.

Previous generations had more responsibilities than we do now, yet we have seemingly more stress an less satisfaction.

Life’s circumstances in many ways provided a simplified life.  There were no Walmarts, Lowes, Hobby Lobby’s etc.  It is easy to be a hoarder with two many interests these days.  Money was saved, set aside, and used practically for the families needs.  Now, credit is a sometime blessing and a many-time curse.  There is always something to buy, and good deals are seductive.

Home-made jams, soaps, candles, or knitted scarfs, or something embroidered were typical gifts when the thought was valued more.  Now, it seems the amount of the gift is a requirement of concern.  Practical gifts of building blocks or a log cabin set were appreciated.  Sadly toddlers are quite tech savvy yet building an engineering skills are being forgotten.  Mechanics, engineers and architects may become rare skills in future generations.  

Plan it! Do it!, Do it!, List it!, Do it, register it!  We go through the phases and we feel exhausted, discouraged as we relist what we want to avoid, yet need to get done.  I have many of these cluttering my conscious an unconscious mind.  Forgetfulness is a consequence of ignoring as a habit.

The standard too do list could be an off shute of our weekly and monthly list.

The standard “To do” list can be recycled into our “Got Done!” List.  I feel so much better writing down what I achieved today.  Also recording my circumstances, like a project manager or contractor on a job site will put in the Log, a start time, how many men on the job, how many subcontractors with crew size an specifics, the weather conditions such as overcast, windy, and 52 degrees, etc.  Writing my circumstances, obligations for day, health challenges, and achievements makes me feel very satisfied.  It is less likely I will judge myself unfairly.

We know what all we have to do.  Just put 12 minutes into the next step of the project and see what happens.

Living fabulously includes simplifying our lives to achieve more focus.  Our Great-Grandparents may no longer be with us yet their examples can always be reconsidered as it’s principles enrich our lives.  I call that a real inheritance.

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Lonely, How can a person get thru the next few days?

Do you ever feel lonely?   Why are you lonely?  Are you alone, or are you in a family and lonely?  Lonely, when there is so much to consider.  Why am I lonely, is it because I am alone?  What can I do to enrich this moment so I no longer feel alone?  Some people are alone, they live alone, and they may not live in the same community as their family.  Families are estranged too often which also contributes to aloneness.  For whatever reason, being alone is not healthy if that is a continuous situation.

If your alone because your mate works a lot or is involved in a lot of activities than have you mentioned that you would like to spend more time with them.   Mention it briefly without weaponry.   The other day, I mentioned to my oldest son whom is married and lives only about 15 minutes away that I am sad we are not able to stop in when we are in the area.  They both work full time, and their lives are so busy that they really do not appreciate people dropping by without calling ahead of time.  They are right.  I think I offended him in the way I commented about it, and he felt I was laying a guilt trip.  That was not my intention and it only further served up sad feelings and frustration that it was received that way.  Therefore, I have no recommendations on how to communicate your feelings.   Just let a person know you would like to spend more time with them and leave it at that.  If your mate is very busy, what activities can you do to be more busy?  Are you fulfilling all your personal and domestic responsibilities?  Join a knitting group or painting group at your local senior citizen center, they would love to have you there even if you are not a senior.  Each week have a day to visit local sites such as museums, gardens or parks, the library or bookstore.  Invite your mate, they may surprise you and take a vacation day off to join you.  The more busy you are, the more accomplished you become, the more you have to talk about, the more interesting you become.  Plan out the month ahead for yourself, then do them.  Keep your calendar visible so your mate can see what your interested in.  This is not to promote independence, it is only living a healthy life.

If you do not have a lot of relationships because you are new to an area then you must understand it takes time to build a relationship.  You do not have to sacrifice your morality or defraud your budget to have a relationship.  Dutch is best, your only in control of you.  Dutch means there are no misconceptions or hidden expectations.  You are nice because you go, be your own transportation.  You never have to prove how nice you are or how interesting or knowledgeable you are.  Yes, whom says you will even like the other party after you get to know them for a while.  So, do not put your morality or money on the line.  Integrity lost in an thoughtless eve can take years to retrieve.

When I am alone, I love projects.  What projects do I have on my agenda right now?  If you are my friend and I assume you are, I would tell you…

My dresser top which is about five feet long had everything it shouldn’t have on it for far too long.  The mirror fell behind the dresser a couple years ago, and because I am overweight, I did not care to look anyway.  Last week,  I decided to remedy the mess and took a couple piles of clothes off and put away, then I consolidated the perfumes and lotions. (Far too many) I do not need to buy more perfumes or lotions according to “The Life-Changing Magic of Tidying Up” expert Marie Kondo.  She advocates tossing most of what you have.  I do not agree with that point since I like what I have and I have the room for it.  I did access what I have with no pressure and made a mental note to use what I have.  There were a few things I chose to toss, and that I had got all the use I wanted from them.  Her program is great, I have just finished the second of  four cd’s from her series I received a couple weeks ago.

As I continued to group and organize my belongings of what was on my dresser top my husband John came in and looked at me and mentioned that ‘wasn’t it time I think about making dinner’.  I agreed that it was a good time to make dinner and that since he could see I was productively busy, couldn’t he make dinner.  Really, I did have the rice an vegetables done in the Black an Decker RC436 type 1, that our son Brock gave us for our anniversary last year.  John, he looked at me when I suggested he let me continue working.  He saw the bed was loaded up with piles of clothes, papers, and junk jewelry.  He left and went to the kitchen likely shaking his head wondering if I would get to clearing the bed.  When I went and stirred the rice which is periodically needed so as not to stick to bottom of cooker, I was pleased to see him using a cookbook trying to decide how he was going to marinate the wild caught salmon he purchased.  As I put away, tossed, or organized  I found things I had been missing.  Now the dresser was lovely again, I could see the dresser scarf I made a few years ago with a precious piece of jacquard fabric that I surged a nice edge on.  So satisfying, and the meal was very satisfying too.  He was very pleased.  The mirror is up, I feel looking into it is not so offensive.  One project done.  Is there a project nagging you to get done, make time now.

Another project is that I am trying to make a nice pair of denim sage green pants.  A good quality fabric always makes it worth doing.  Purchased pants no longer come up to the waist, and that is what I like, a hi-rider.  Do you sew?  Many men and women sew of all ages.  It can be frustrating at times, bobbins pop up, needles break or the fit is not right.  Fix it and keep sewing.  Finally the pants look like nice pants, just need to hem them.  That is not all, the frustrating part is that I have to take the yoke I designed off the back, and decrease a few inches because thankfully, they are too large at where the lower back is.  A couple darts and a zipper are required then, incorporating the lovely yoke is a creative challenge I am mentally working out.

A lot of rest I have needed in the last couple weeks due to extremely low blood pressure, fevers, and exhaustion.  When your dizzy, you should lay down so you do not fall down.  With a cut on the bottom of my left foot, whom wants to walk a lot anyway.  The infection in left leg seems to finally be healing.  Almost.  Sounds so dreary really.  Projects keep my mind busy.  Do you have projects?  Proverbs 31 suggest them greatly.

Loneliness, do you send cards?  Snail mail is the best, support our Post Offices and they will not be a thing of the past.  I value the sweet cards I receive and letters, and I send a lot of cards and letters every week.  I send cards and sometimes gifts to complete strangers.  If I hear someone does well at something, or if someone is sick, or suffers a loss, then a card is what I can do to support mankind.  Expressing commendation where it is truly due, or compassion, empathy and support, that is something any of us can do.  My handwriting suffers due to rheumatoid, so I prayerfully choose my words, and then I write a brief note.  The Tuesday Morning stores have beautiful stationary at affordable prices.  TJ Maxx, or The Ross are other department stores that also sell cards and or stationary at decent prices.  Do not wait for a card or wait for kindness or thoughtfulness.  When you send a card or small letter, send with prayers, hopes, but no expectations.  Every week cards or letters go out, and usually a few come in.  So sweet, the treasure trove of thoughtfulness can be in quiet moments.  Being alone enjoying expressions of someone now gone is also a healing.  The mother whom raised me, (some day I will explain that) sent me a letter with ten dollars suggesting I go get a dessert for the boys and I that we would ordinarily not do because of cost.  She lived far away.  We did as she suggested and that was so very sweet.  She has been gone for possibly twelve years now.  I have that little letter which I kept in a little box that I recently discarded, now it is put in a little book of knitting socks, and periodically a couple times a year I pull the letter out , read and weep.  Yes, she has no idea how meaningful the gift was then and how it still affects me now.

When the boys were toddlers, there I was now a single mother with three.  With no family to turn to, no child support, loneliness was a common occurrence.  Being overwhelmed with financial responsibilities, working contract work in the field of architecture and construction, life was feast or famine.  From mid November until about February, there were little opportunities to work, so I became an expert at stretching the dough.  One time, I earned three dollars too much to qualify for any assistance.  Others seemed to be doing so well on assistance, and we were getting evicted with no where to go.  I always have had my faith and many times my brothers and sisters in our faith were the ones to come to the rescue.  For that I am so appreciative.  I found it so humiliating to be in need and strived to handle our problems on my own.  There were times I was so lonely it was almost crippling.  Having projects even then was so helpful.  I made the most adorable denim and suede coats for my sons.  Proud I wanted them to be, and I wanted them to feel equivalent to those around, and I would tell them although we did not have bucks in the wallet, we were still richer than most.  I would take them to the Home Depot classes for children to learn how to make things.  They loved it, and it built healthy esteems in them too.  As adult men, they design and build whatever they want.  Blake designed a wonderful bed, dresser, closet unit, and it even had secret drawers.  I was so impressed.  He knows he can design and make what he needs when he wants.  It saddened me when they disassembled it.  Brock designed a treehouse with an elevator that goes up.  He lives there.  When people stop in, they always want him to take them up in the elevator to see the treehouse.   Brent, he is now a plumber, and he buys, fixes, sells, and trades cars.  He designed an entertainment center the whole length of the wall in his bedroom 14′ long, that was interlocking with no screws or nails.  Now he has designed an L shaped dresser, entertainment center, that also has cubbies for ties, and a shoe organizer.  He is striving to finish that.  So proud I am that we struggled through the hard times optimistically enduring.  They are three adults, sons that have proved to be survivors.  Do you have a single parent that you work with or live near?  Can you give them a gift card for a tank of gas, or an oil change, or a Walmart gift card for new shoes an socks for all, or haircuts, or coats.  With no expectations, a gift lifts both the giver and receiver.  Commendation also goes a long way.

So crafts may not be your thing, you do not want a mess.  How many people have guest rooms set perfectly up with the hopes of company that never comes.  I am a great advocate of the futon because it folds up into a couch and is a comfortable bed when need be.  My friend Michelle let me stay at her home unexpectantly for two an a half weeks when my father died.  I had just had another surgery and felt incapable of being on my own with a rented car an a place to stay, a short term amnesia besides the sadness of the situation and unnecessary family  drama, I was happy to have her generous support and the futon was comfortable too.  This was her and her husband’s office which was occasionally used as a guest room when need be.  Turning the guest room into a multipurpose room means you can keep your sewing machine set up.  Make yourself a blouse, or a pillow for a friend etc.  Or set up a small area to make jewelry or some other thing you have been interested in.

These next few days can be rough on some, take advantage of the extra time and learn something new, take a walk, call an old friend, finish something, or clean out your cabinets.  Make a list and work it.  I am starting to read the Bible book of Acts, I heard it is inspiring.  For some of these activities, being alone is a Godsend.

 

 

 

New Schedule, The Adreniline is … I cannot stand it. The Thrill of …

So excited your heart is racing, you cannot focus, the anticipation of it all is driving you up the …   When you have hopes, dreams, ideas, plans, projects, need I say more.  You cannot focus on what your loved ones are talking about, your thinking about it while doing other things, even television cannot take it off your mind.

This is how the Architectural mind works.  The mind of a designer, or a creative person is picturing all the details in their mind.  Do not interrupt my thoughts.  The mind of an engineer or mechanic plotting, analyzing, figuring, assessing, estimating, resolving, all takes mental energy, drive, and enthusiasm.

Applying these traits in our personal life to resolve our stagnation or problems can give us hope while turning our situation upside down like newly tilled soil.  Just as soil needs a good turnover, so doesn’t our life.  While minding our morality and principles we can consider great changes.

How can we assess our life?  Are we lonely?  Are we frustrated?  Are we bored?  Are we fat? Are we tired?  Is the routine predictable?  Is there stagnation with the old hum drum routine?

Some things take time to change, whether it is our financial situation, relationships, esteem, domestic situation, and the list goes on.

Example:  A person that is fat, out of shape, lonely, not treated as respectfully as one would like, that feels opportunities are not offered to them as they are others. This guy can feel quite trapped.  The routine of eating, computer games, and hours of television leaves them frustrated and unfulfilled.  One day this person sees the blog fatfitanfab.com and is inspired to make a couple adjustments.  Replacing unhealthy drinks with more water his skin is clearing up and he is not feeling so sluggish, seems less bloated.  Because he is shutting off the television after the evening news he is getting a few things done in the evening and he is getting to bed earlier.  He has started a thirty minute walk in the early a.m. daily before work.  With the habit of a healthy breakfast each day he has more energy and less cravings.  Just being alert and energetic in the morning it seems he is getting so much more done at work.   He cannot believe how he now has to wear a belt because he really needs to buy a size smaller in pants.  Others notice the change in him and seem to enjoy conversation with him because he seems more happy.  The boss is responding as if he has greater confidence in him now.

You see what I am getting at, just a few little changes in habits and routines can enrich our lives.  It is very thrilling to contemplate.

My goal is to go to bed earlier, to get up earlier, and to spend the time in the morning doing what I usually view as a treat to do, do that until noon before I need to get my daily responsibilities done.  I realize I have been doing it wrong, like dangling a treat, that I never will get, only to be disappointed day after day.  As if that would be my reward just if I …you know how it goes, we do it to ourselves, to our kids, to our loved ones.  The promised incentive that never comes.

Doing an abrupt face is exciting, addressing the problem completely differently.  Thinking of our children, when we practice the method of  going to the park after you finish your homework it causes frustration, anger, and sadness.  The homework session drags out hopelessly until it is too late to go to the park.  Real punishment.  Instead, ask the child how long it will take to do the homework, then go to the park with that in mind.  Have a great time.  As soon as you get home and the child washes their face and hands, drinks some water, then right away get to the homework.  Set the timer with that much time and add a buffer of fifteen minutes for the encouragement.  A few days of the park first may prove to be stimulating for the child.  Whom wants to go to school all day and sit in front of the homework for an hour or two.  Instead of resentment, it will be refreshment, accomplishment and joy.

What my sons have done to enrich their life is they have a bowling league now on Wednesdays, and they have a great time.  One evening a week going to a bible meeting is rewarding.  An evening at the Library or local book store.  Whom is lonely now.  We can be alone enjoying any of these activities and not feel lonely.  We have an activity to look forward to.  My husband took me to the bookstore tonight.  After days of being sick and unable to go anywhere I was thrilled when he suggested going to my favorite store.  I love the “how to” section, how to cook, sew, or knit, etc.  I know how to do all these things but I just love projects and I feel like an crazy nut about all I want to do.  In reality it is not possible to do all I want to do, but I will think about that tomorrow…

Your whole family will benefit from a few adjustments in your life.  The whole family and loved ones may not at first cooperate with the hoped for changes.  It may be us alone making the adjustments while not forcing change on others.  Include your family in these changes invitingly an see joy restored.   Just as an Architect, Engineer or Mechanic address a problem.  We can assess our life an redesign it with optimism.  Is your Adrenaline pumping and is your heart racing?