Friendships definately stimulate joy in our lives. How do we make friends in the cyber world? How about an old fashioned face to face contact, conversations and good times.
Loniliness is an actual problem for many. Life’s responsibilities keep most so busy they only have time to carry out their domestic duties and get rest when the next day presents the same.
Of course some are very shy and do not know how to get the conversation ball rolling and keep it rolling and for how long.
With good things there are always limits, boundaries, and rules of respect.
Imagine if one friend works and has children she is definately going to have less time then an older semi-retired person with no children. So if you want to visit with her, invite them all over and have a meal ready with no requirements of her. Understand children have bedtimes, homework, and she may still have washing to do for the week. Do not be hurt that she must leave so soon? You did help and your friendship means a lot.
I love spending time with my friends. My friend Susan made lovely cards and has organized an old fashioned tea party on Sunday afternoon. Exciting.
My friend Danielle and her daughter are learning how to sew from me and are progressing quite well. We love spending time together while being productive. We are all learning new things.
Valerie is teaching me how to Garden, she is amazing. I kinda get out of the way, she moves fast and confidently as I hang around wanting to help and I am not useful. She has taught me so much and the garden is lovely. We have good times together talking and laughing. Her household goes to bed early so although we could hang out til they kick us out or make another bed, we strive to be considerate and leave not too later than their usual bedtime. 😂
I do not like to ask people how they are because it is an unfair question. The rule of thumb is to smile and say good or fine while you may be dying inside.
I like to ask what a person has coming up next week, or did they recently do anything enjoyable. Last evening I asked Danielle if she had anything fun coming up? She said she and her husband, son and daughter were going to an dinasaur exhibit. I think that is so exciting. I look forward to our conversation after they have experienced this.
We must be more interesting than the internet. Instead of watching movies, playing games on phone, internet cruising, and such. Learn to live your life! Be the heroine of your own story instead of passively letting it pass you by. Imagine how many hours are wasted on the internet or television. Add them up if you dare. Time runs out of the day, week, months and years. Yes, our life can passively pass us by.
By doing activities, we become interesting. For instance, I finally lost a couple pounds, only a couple. It was enough to wear my floral linen dress I wore it and was happy for a little bit, until I realized the side splits came up half my thigh. As soon as I got home I got my box of grommets out and while talking to my almost 26 year old son, Brock is my middle son which always has it’s advantages, and my husband. The unusual course of things is they think I do not know how to do things They cannot resist taking over and have great fun doing it. So he took everything from me and now he was setting the grommets into my dress side slits where I had marked When he was nearing finish He said, “as usual mom, you start things you do not know how to do, good thing I came around”, and he has one eyebrow up for emphasis. It took everything to keep from laughing hysterically. I then said to John, my husband, “how come you did not say it was your turn to set some grommets like when I made my striped bag you too fought over your turns like little children?!”. He just looked at me as I giggled about the both of them. If I want to set the grommets, I have to take my things and hide under a tree. Yet, these men, my husband and sons create such entertainment I think This is truly called living. Being involved in activities together. Oh, my dress looks cute with the shoe lace look, I used embroidery threads and put beads on.
I asked my husband what was one thing he noticed and liked about me. His reply was, “you were always doing something, and no matter what was going on with you or around you, you were always so chipper and happy”. I thought that was great because that is how I am.
Quit reading about others so much, live a life worth writing about in your own journal. Write down something positive someone said to you, or a good outcome of something you worried about. I like to combine my journal with my calendar and master lists for weeks and months so my accomplishments and direction or focus is all together in one place. I am thru trying to buy journals and calendars. There are none perfect and they run out of months. Living my life includes making a personal everlasting journal/calendar/masterlist binder I can add to an take away from all I like.
Set up your challenge and stick to it. Mine is Daily Bible reading, daily practice of simplified domestic schedule, sewing, gardening and painting regularly. Oh, do not forget hospitality. Invite ones to meet for coffee, or to library for a book on a place you want to vacation. Greece or Peru, I cannot afford to go but I can plan my ideal trip anyway and pray about it.
The point is, Be your own friend first, go to museums, concerts, learn to dance, learn a hobby, fill your time with wholesome activities. Friends will naturally come in time. We are not desperate for friends, that makes us vulnerable and stupid. Be discerning and do not immediately befriend anyone. Do not drop your life story on anyone the first few times you meet and do not feel the need to pull personal information from them. It all comes in time. If someone has undesirable traits that concern you, gently mention it and give them the benefit of doubt. Yet, we have no right over others. Their choices are their own to make. I like to show from the Bible how God, Jehovah and his son, Jesus feel about the matter. This way it is not my opinion or preference. People are not perfect and I am far from perfect. Allow people to be themselves. Sometimes friends come and go. Yet, some will stick with you through the years.
Living our life, being God’s friend, our own friend, a friend to our family, and others will freely draw near and it is a delightful journey.
Now, my domestics need attention, then I will stop an sew or paint later this afternoon. Live! Live! Today.