Marcia K. Rydin

A Successful Woman

Marcia K. Rydin was an accomplished woman.  A Very independent woman whom achieved wherever she wanted to achieve.

First, let me inform the reader, I am not an authority on Marcia K. Rydin.  Only knowing Marcia about 16 years, knowing someone when they are 85 and older is not knowing them in their prime.  I can only relay a few things and only want to talk about what I know.  Please forgive me if anything is inaccurate.

Marcia was born in July of 1917.  And had she lived a few more months would have been 102 years old.  I miss Marcia and think about her so much.  I want to write about her yet, not any form of biography etc.  just a note about what she mentioned to me.

Her parents immigrated here from Europe.  Marcia’s father was good at a variety of things.  Marcia’s mother was very artistic. She was a hat Milner and a seamstress, she could do anything.  Franciska raised her two daughters to do anything that came to their mind.

They resided in Chicago, imagine the depression, food rationing, the prohibition, and the wars.  Hard times they knew well and took in stride like everyone else had to do at the time.  They were innovative in the variety of things they would and could do just to care for their family responsibilities.  Franciska even had borders, rooms she rented out.  Marcia said one of the borders behaved indecently towards her and her mother immediately kicked him out.  Good mother!

Everyone dressed with esteem and always seemed to wear a hat.  Habits domestically and  thriftyness seemed second nature

Marcia grew up in a time where manners were still a part of you.  A strict disapline, how you stood, sat, walked, talked, dressed, table manners, and learning an art( singing, dancing, riding, sewing, needlework, playing the piano etc.).  I believe such disciplines were a gift of esteem.  What is wrong with the world we live in?  Would we all get kicked out of the dining room for not minding our manners?!  What dining room! What manners!  It is nice, many try to inculcate these into their children, yet, most do not which makes it hard for those that do.  Yet, it is an investment in our children to have an exercise in those disciplines so they can become healthy responsible adults.  A rare breed indeed!  As Marcia was a real go getter she created a host of memories and accomplishments to consider when she felt the effects of age set in.

When Marcia was a little child pitching a fit her mother said, “there goes Marcia”!, and there she went the rest of her life.

It still is not easy to write this and there is a certain stress I feel regarding accuracy.  So, I cannot write about her life.  She talked with me about these things and they were quite enjoyable to learn about.  This article is not a family history etc.  This is just a small tribute regarding Marcia and the life she lived.  This is not an biography of any sort.

Marcia loved to shop the fine department stores in Chicago.  She loved to dress nice and she even sewed herself many things over the years.  Somehow she would get tags from some of these department stores and she would sew up things an attach these tags.  I was really amazed by this.  One of these department stores had a floor they sold fabric and tags as well.  Her sewing was perfectly executed.

The theatre, museums, and music Marcia really enjoyed.  A walk down lakeshore drive was an experience she treasured.

Marcia was married to Carl Rydin and they had three sons together.  Marcia’s mother Franciska lived with them and helped raise the boys.  When Marcia had her first son John, she would take him in his buggy an walk down Lakeshore drive daily.  Another thing she mentioned was that she gave John head to toe massages everyday.  Marcia’s attitude was when he cried, let him cry it out.  The neighbors would complain so much because John could holler and it was a war of wills.  She loved her three sons, John, Jimmie, and Richard.  She generously tried to equip them to be self reliant.

When the boys were grown, Marcia decided to relocate to Alabama to be near her sister. In time Marcia bought a little house on some acreage and fixed it up.  She had a horse and rode her horse everyday before work.  She did additions to her home and loved to plant a variety of plants, shrubs and trees.  We loved to go to plant shows together.

Marcia enjoyed her work in the secretarial field. She had an air of authority.  Even at the end of her life she wanted things written, she wanted things done, she loved trying to get things going with the lawyers, can’t we go here, can’t we do this and she felt we could just do these things ourself.

When she lived in Illinois, as a young woman looking for work in the war years it was difficult.  There was a long line you stood in and everyday you went back an stood in the line hoping to be picked.  When she was picked she would say she could do this or that, even if she couldn’t.  Once she was found out, she said that she would be threatened with dismissal.  She was a fast learner and aggressively pursued through education and opportunity whatever she needed to know to get ahead and stand on her own.

Throughout her life, this strength was one of her greatest and worst qualities.  I believe she lived as long as she did due to this inner strength and determination.  Marcia was disciplined with her routines and was a real timekeeper.  She checked her watch all her life.  Always knowing where she should be an what she should be doing.  Being oblivious to time, I was a real study for her.  I learned a lot from her.  There are many things I miss about her.   It was not a perfect situation nor do I want to present it that way.  Yet, we had so many good times together that I value.

Marcia loved my cooking, when here for visits she would say, “where are my scones?!”  Off to the kitchen we would go so I could make a batch of scones.

She loved cooking with me. We had such fun in the kitchen.

Marcia knit this in the 1970’s An it was a mohair blanket kit. I attached a soft piece of fleece to the back for this to be a lap throw for her. She loved seeing her work turned into something useful.

I miss our cooking together.

She lived with John an I approximately the last seven months of her life.  We put her in the middle of the house.  She was near our room so we could hear her at night and we wanted her to be near the bathroom.  We also did not want her stuffed in a room isolated and lonely.  She had confided that she suffered loneliness most her life.  And the last decade was the most painful for her.  This saddened us because we felt prohibited from visiting her as much as we would have liked when she lived in her home.  Other parties did not make visiting comfortable.  Therefore, we just did not want her to feel alone at any point.  We never left her alone.  Either we took her everywhere, or one of us stayed here with her or we would get someone she and we knew to come visit with her so we could go.  We have company often and she really enjoyed the interaction.  While she was here our friend from China came for two weeks.  Then our friends from Maine came for a visit.  Then our friends from Florida came An we had a big cookout.  She just loved all the interaction.    She had friends whom she knew a long time that stopped in an visited.  Her priest came by and he was kind and considerate.  The hospice staff helped me keep it together as I was not experienced and lacked confidence.  Her son Richard came by and spent time with her.

It was not a perfect situation because being dependent was not anything she cared for.  We have not been caregivers before so we all had to learn together.  My husband had already been ill before she died and he continued having strokes so he was in a hospital rehab facility the last couple weeks before she died.  Being here and being there for my husband was a real stretch as I did not feel well.  Our friends were here everyday for us.  And our sons helped out any way they could.  The youngest, Brent with his wife Brittteny came to stay a few weeks to help as well.  What a comfort and support that was!  At some point I felt I lost my marbles and cried inappropriately and laughed inappropriately.  During her short stay with us, always eventful.  I fall often due to low blood pressure.  Surgery to repair tendon and screw my big toe back together was painful and hard to go thru.  One of the times I stubbed my toe an fell I cried like a baby even hyperventilating.  She petted my hair and comforted me w a tenderness I had not seen in her before.  One time I was overwhelmed and distressed she chastised me “talk to Jehovah and place your faith in him”.  She cheered me up.  My God Jehovah helped me persevere and provided our friends day an night to get thru these times.  John did come home a couple weeks later after she went to sleep in death.  As his needs have changed we are changing too.  Our life is busy and complicated, yet we have many blessings.

We loved to do projects together over the years.  Marcia loved the sewing projects.  We would get a t shirt and use it against a piece of knit fabric and make a pattern the way we liked.  I would cut an sew as we would sit in my messy sewing room.  Marcia wore the garments with pride because we made them together.  She loved to give direction, and I although an experienced sewer too, loved the opportunity to consider something new.  We learned from each other.

Marcia had grandchildren she enjoyed when they were young.  It grieved her none were around in The last few decades of her life.  She felt forgotten and the emotional pain of being alone really got to her at times.

Marcia was a woman of faith.  She loved the creator Jehovah and his son Jesus.  About two weeks before she died she started crying, something rare for her.  She said “Jehovah proved the priests wrong.”   I was amazed.  She loved those she interacted with but her faith had changed.  She said if she was young again her choices would be different.  I thought that was humble and sweet of her.

Ahead of her times, fiercely independent, Marcia was a real survivor.  Marcia whom is sleeping now in God’s memory, she will be awakened from death and enjoy perfect health an youthfulness as she is reunited with all those she knew and loved.  Mathew 6:10, Revelation 21:4,5.  Psalm 37:9-11,29.  At the end she was happy to know this hope an understand it.  It gave her comfort in her last months.  I believed that was really why she came to us.  She died this year, 2019.  And I felt she was content and ready.  I wish I had known her decades ago when I needed a worthy woman to look up to an learn from.

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Altogether untogether, do you ever feel this way?

At times, life’s responsibilities are so overwhelming it is hard to remember whom we are and what we like to do.

We try so hard to keep it together, then it is so easy to land onto the couch and watch an episode of Gunsmoke or something.  Yet, is it becoming our thing, our habit to drop and chill?  Is there any other way to reconnect with the joy of living the life?

My Dear mother in law is living with us.  She is 101 years old.  Overall it is going fine.  My husband nor I feel well and it makes everything so challenging.

Thankfully, she does not complain much and goes with the flow.

A friend makes pound cakes and shares by showing up at bad times and gives these to encourage others.  Although it has been a couple years and she is going thru so much herself.  I believe she deserves some pound cakes.  I asked Lisa to share her recipe and she did.  I know there are thousands of poundcake recipes online, but there is nothing like one shared by a friend you know to be good.  I brought Marcia into the kitchen and we visited as I put the cake together.  It was a nice experience and it turned out well.  This afternoon Marcia looked at me and said, where is this cake we baked?!  So I brought her a big piece and she liked it.  Which of course made me very happy.

Today, I just wanted to be in bed.  Everything hurts and I am tired.  This week there has been plans to teach a young lady how to sew pillows an insert the forms.  Her mother and she picked out many nice fabrics at a fabric store and pillow forms.  Marcia enjoyed watching us girls measure, cut and sew.  All turned out fine and it was a joy.   Her mother gave me some of the lovely fabrics.  What a treat!

When I plan time w others I have to think ahead for the meals to avoid temptations of eating out.  Our middle son Brock gave me a rice cooker so tonight I dropped in frozen chopped Peppers an onions, a couple packages of jumbulia ricean beans, Conecka sausage, chicken broth and pinto beans and just let it cook itself in this rice cooker   It turned out very well with minimal effort.   When your just tired it makes you happy when things turn out well.

We made an agreement this week to really watch how we spend and that we want to live on the leaner side.  We do not always recognize how easily we live in a luxurious manner.  We meaning anyone.  We want to pay off any debt and live within our means more closely.  Circumstances change and are we really prepared for them?

My friend Vickie, her husband is dealing with extreme health issues, she has a special needs son besides.  Vickie has always managed to keep her home together, help others and go for walks.  We were talking tonight and reminding each other of the importance of having little things you like to do.  Making time to do these activities.   Vickie is accepting help from others to take her husband for his treatments.  It is humble of her to accept the help because he and she has been good to so many over the years.  He gains encouragement from spending time with others and experiencing their care for him.

A family we cherish in the Panama City, Florida area that was affected by the hurricane expressed today that they are just longing for some normalcy.  We really were designed to have routines and steady circumstances.  Our creator designed us to be stable and that is what we yearn for.  When our world is upside down we are too!  They will be coming for a brief visit in a couple weeks and we look forward to it.

I am taking a course with the Tidy Tudor.  It is very enjoyable.  About good habits and ways of thinking that affect our life in a more healthful manner.  I am not naturally organized and would like to be.  Kathy Roberts is very motivating with a new step each day or concept to consider.

Right now the house seems a mess and it has only been six days that I finally got a shot to settle my asthma down.   I am not up to par.  My husband and I neaten up and Vaccume before bed because we like it looking nice when we get up.   Somehow, it gets totally destroyed each day, I do not know how it happens.

Three points to get out of all my jibber jabber.

  1.  Remember some activity you always enjoyed doing and include that in your life.  Whether it be working out, dancing, tennis, woodworking, needlework, gardening or baking etc.  make the time for it.  It is important!  Even Daily Bible Reading  is considered to be the most valuable of activities to include in our life.  I know making the time for it makes a difference in my outlook and attitude.
  2. Include people in your life no matter how crazy your life seems.  People help keep our perspective healthful.  I enjoy company, such a boost!
  3. Habits and routines are sanity keepers.  If it is difficult to get on track, ask for help or take a mini course.  Tap into our reset button and just do the basics until recovery is bestowed on us.  Choose something from each of the three on the list and see if it does not help a little.

Our lives are always changing and we must adjust or we can break under the pressure.

Written by:  Gina Rydin of fatfitanfab.com

When you are down for the count, how do you recouperate?

When it is already bad, and Yes! It can get worse.  Has this happened to you?  I was already dealing with left lower leg infection an inflammation when an ER doctor cut open an area on upper thigh an that is now infected.  I was bummed out but I was optimistically proceeding  through the beginning of Feb,. That is when I stepped into a small depression of the ground.  Now I cannot walk, a cracked bone where the tendon attaches to the bone. This had to be operated on.

With a fragile immune system, I had to be on IV medications with the help of home health.  Using a knee walker to get around it was very difficult.

It is odd how sometimes we can feel like we are other peoples burden.  It is a challenge to stay optimistic when you have one more thing happen.  Yet, there is a few things we can do during our down times.

I planted alot of seeds in little cups and watched them grow.   Over fifty green pepper plants came up and a nice variety.  We were able to share many plants.  Our friend Paul grows pimento peppers and they are so lovely.  He always gives us plants.  He suffers a simular chronic illness and he has many physical accidents.  Having his plants and gardens helps him to be optimistic.  Currently he has a broken arm from a bad fall.  His wife appreciates the additional work of tending the garden.  He has seeds and plants under lights on these tables he grows.  Everyone appreciates the plants and also the vegtables he shares.  I love the cabbages and lettuce.

And well over a year later, I come back to this article which has been sitting in my WordPress draft.  It was too painful at the time to continue.

Since then I deal with more physical pain and heart issues while my husband is dealing with a very simular condition.  It seems we are all down for the count one way or another.  Some days or weeks or years are better or worse.  Always changing, we must hang on!

Enjoying jw.org keeps us in touch with our worldwide family and pleasant videos that intrigue us while warming our hearts.

Three ways to maintain a positive attitude.

  1.  Recognize each day has it’s hardships and blessings.  By recognizing both we can have joy despite hardships because we can always be on the lookout for the good.  Sunshine in the morning, the taste of fresh fruit, the smell of apples baking with butter, oatmeal and cinnamon on top.  A smile from a loved one.  Reading the book of Proverbs can also lift us.
  2. Keeping a simple routine of domestic responsibilities while making time for a cup of coffee makes a big difference.  Keeping our environment nice can help us to have a measure of control.  Of course, a part of me says, “That is hogwash!”  Why would I say this?  I was keeping a routine and improving the overall look of our home.  A family emergency occurred a week ago and we have had to move furniture and things to create living space for our lovely family member whom is enduring much hardship.  The house looks awful, everything achieved in months is destroyed in a week.  Ha, and this is life!  We must accept the curveballs when they come.  Always Learning to adjust our circumstances with joy.  I am restarting my routine in the morning.
  3. Hobbies and personal interests do have their place.  Trade up television or game time for a simple hobby that brings you joy.  One of my friends told me that her full time job and other responsibilities leaves her so drained that plopping down in front of her television has become her routine.  Yet, it is unsatisfactory and she feels so unmotivated.  I asked her to tell me about her home.  It turns out she has a guest room and has had no guests for years.  Her house is an unorganized overwhelming mess, like mine.  I suggested that she get rid of the guest room status, boot it out!  Claim her space, by setting up an area to do her sewing and crafts.  Set up a relaxing corner to do her personal Bible study.  She loves the idea and is going to try that.  She is excited about the prospect of hunting down a few pieces of furniture to redo.  Seeing her face light up cheered me up too.  Maybe she will let me come for an hour or two and help her figure it out.  Fun! Fun!

Whom really needs a guest room?  Most houses are too small to start with.  Are there cobwebs between those sheets?  Musty smells.  For those whom often have guests, ignore my strong opinions.  I always appreciate staying in someone’s nice guest room.  Guests are always welcome here.

Since first writing this article I am happy to be able to walk.  Although still enduring great pain and fatigue, I appreciate the many joys in my life.  I want you to find enjoyment in your life too.  Always make time to pray about it, asking Jehovah for help and direction when finding your way seems so daunting.  You may be surprised about how you may find a new way to handle old problems.

Written by Gina Rydin Author of all fatfitanfab.com articles

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Friends make life more tolerable and bring joy.

Friendships definately stimulate joy in our lives.  How do we make friends in the cyber world?  How about an old fashioned face to face contact, conversations and good times.

Loniliness is an actual problem for many. Life’s responsibilities keep most so busy they only have time to carry out their domestic duties and get rest when the next day presents the same.

Of course some are very shy and do not know how to get the conversation ball rolling and keep it rolling and for how long.

With good things there are always limits, boundaries, and rules of respect.

Imagine if one friend works and has children she is definately going to have less time then an older semi-retired person with no children.  So if you want to visit with her, invite them all over and have a meal ready with no requirements of her.  Understand children have bedtimes, homework, and she may still have washing to do for the week.  Do not be hurt that she must leave so soon?  You did help and your friendship means a lot.

I love spending time with my friends.  My friend Susan made lovely cards and has organized an old fashioned tea party on Sunday afternoon.  Exciting.

My friend Danielle and her daughter are learning how to sew from me and are progressing quite well. We love spending time together while being productive.  We are all learning new things.

Valerie is teaching me how to Garden, she is amazing.  I kinda get out of the way, she moves fast and confidently as I hang around wanting to help and I am not useful.  She has taught me so much and the garden is lovely. We have good times together talking and laughing.  Her household goes to bed early so although we could hang out til they kick us out or make another bed, we strive to be considerate and leave not too later than their usual bedtime.  😂

I do not like to ask people how they are because it is an unfair question.  The rule of thumb is to smile and say good or fine while you may be dying inside.

I like to ask what a person has coming up next week, or did they recently do anything enjoyable.   Last evening I asked Danielle if she had anything fun coming up?  She said she and her husband, son and daughter were going to an dinasaur exhibit.  I think that is so exciting.  I look forward to our conversation after they have experienced this.

We must be more interesting than the internet.  Instead of watching movies, playing games on phone, internet cruising, and such.  Learn to live your life!  Be the heroine of your own story instead of passively letting it pass you by.  Imagine how many hours are wasted on the internet or television.  Add them up if you dare.  Time runs out of the day, week, months and years. Yes, our life can passively pass us by.

By doing activities, we become interesting.  For instance, I finally lost a couple pounds, only a couple.  It was enough to wear my floral linen dress   I wore it and was happy for a little bit, until I realized the side splits came up half my thigh.  As soon as I got home I got my box of grommets out and while talking to my almost 26 year old son, Brock is my middle son which always has it’s advantages, and my husband.  The unusual course of things is they think I do not know how to do things   They cannot resist taking over and have great fun doing it.  So he took everything from me and now he was setting the grommets into my dress side slits where I had marked   When he was nearing finish He said, “as usual mom, you start things you do not know how to do, good thing I came around”, and he has one eyebrow up for emphasis.  It took everything to keep from laughing hysterically.   I then said to John, my husband, “how come you did not say it was your turn to set some grommets like when I made my striped bag you too fought over your turns like little children?!”.  He just looked at me as I giggled about the both of them.   If I want to set the grommets, I have to take my things and hide under a tree.  Yet, these men, my husband and sons create such entertainment I think This is truly called living.  Being involved in activities together.  Oh,  my dress looks cute with the shoe lace look, I used embroidery threads and put beads on.

I asked my husband what was one thing he noticed and liked about me.  His reply was, “you were always doing something, and no matter what was going on with you or around you, you were always so chipper and happy”.  I thought that was great because that is how I am.

Quit reading about others so much, live a life worth writing about in your own journal.  Write down something positive someone said to you, or a good outcome of something you worried about.  I like to combine my journal with my calendar and master lists for weeks and months so my accomplishments and direction or focus is all together in one place.  I am thru trying to buy journals and calendars.  There are none perfect and they run out of months.  Living my life includes making a personal everlasting journal/calendar/masterlist binder I can add to an take away from all I like.

Set up your challenge and stick to it.  Mine is Daily Bible reading, daily practice of simplified domestic schedule, sewing, gardening and painting regularly.  Oh, do not forget hospitality.  Invite ones to meet for coffee, or to library for a book on a place you want to vacation.  Greece or Peru, I cannot afford to go but I can plan my ideal trip anyway and pray about it.

The point is, Be your own friend first, go to museums, concerts, learn to dance, learn a hobby, fill your time with wholesome activities.  Friends will naturally come in time.  We are not desperate for friends, that makes us vulnerable and stupid.  Be discerning and do not immediately befriend anyone.   Do not drop your life story on anyone the first few times you meet and do not feel the need to pull personal information from them.  It all comes in time.  If someone has undesirable traits that concern you, gently mention it and give them the benefit of doubt.  Yet, we have no right over others.  Their choices are their own to make.  I like to show from the Bible how God, Jehovah and his son, Jesus feel about the matter.  This way it is not my opinion or preference.  People are not perfect and I am far from perfect.  Allow people to be themselves.  Sometimes friends come and go.  Yet, some will stick with you through the years.

Living our life, being God’s friend, our own friend, a friend to our family, and others will freely draw near and it is a delightful journey.

Now, my domestics need attention, then I will stop an sew or paint later this afternoon.  Live! Live! Today.

Being Inspired and Inspiring others

Radiating warmth, comes from a mind and heart full of optimism for the well being of all you come in contact with.

The fact that hardships abound and there is no discrimination.  We cannot know the pain in another’s heart.

We cannot solve others problems, yet, we can lift another’s spirits.  It may be possible to help them see other choices available.  The power of making choices based on the best of options and possible outcomes can improve our life.

Fear can blind us to the options we have.  We can feel so limited because of our situation.  Threatening situations can keep us bound, like we come up with all the reasons to avoid a change. Imaging our situation will become worse, and yes it could.  Yet, a change is just that, a change.   It could change for the better as well.

Supporting another’s progress whether it is weight loss, or a cleaner home, or a more positive attitude is supporting a better society. We must invest in each other joyfully and optimistically.

A friend of mine is so perky, generous, optimistic.  She is refreshing.  I have been gravitating toward positive people. It is great having her in my life.

At times we have people in our life that are so emotionally taxing.  Emotional heavyweights are just that, how can we help them to have a different view of life?  Sometimes we cannot help another with their viewpoints or problems.  We may be the heavyweight ourself with the serious problems.  Our circumstances may seem daunting.  There may not always be clear answers.  We can always reconsider advice previously offered.  I have not always been ready to change, then privately, I think and pray about it.   There are times I try a new way and am benefitted.  It is easy to understand why change is so difficult.  I am a reforming near-hoarder.   Sometime, I will tell you about it.   People have tried to advise, counsel, and emotionally force a change.  Only the last couple years have I figured it out with the help of some good programs. Change can feel like a very drawn out process.  I want to be better now!  Ok, I am better now because I am making the adjustments.  Impatient with myself because I know how I want to be, and change is a practice, not a wish.

We might feel bad that we cannot help another, we after all have our own responsibilities and problems.  The Bible says we will carry our own load.  If we are on the phone every day hearing about another’s troubles, and we are so emotionally involved we get stressed how can we adequately attend to our own.  Imagine if we have a mate and children and we use the time we should be attentive to them to be stressed about another’s problems while neglecting those we should be actively loving.

Friendships are essential to emotional health.  A friend is someone that we can enjoy activities with, talk with, enjoying a positive interchange.  I have some friends whom are optimistic, they have not given up on me.  Their faith in me is essential and supports my growth.  I have a belief that a hand-up policy is the best.

Some enter our life suddenly like a breeze.  Refreshing their ways are and we  blessed.  In many ways we feel capable again.  We look forward realizing change and joy are possible.   They are an answer to a prayer. Just as suddenly they have moved on, but we were blessed.

Thank you to all whom have had faith in me, loving me despite.  Thank you!

Gina

 

Devastated but not Defeated!

It is said we live through our children.  To a degree this may be true.  As parents, we try to raise our children better than we thought we were raised.  We invest time, a lot of money, love, confidence so they can have a grand future.   How is this working?

The sad reality is children grow and go no matter how we raise them. We can be great parents according to our perspective, or we can be terrible parents according to their perspective.

What is the point then?  Parenting is a tough job. The world is against us in many ways. Our children are exposed to everything we try to protect them from.  What we said no to is the first thing they seek out when given a chance. Some adult children reflect on instilled values and use them as their guide.   Others have to tread on all sorts of troublesome paths and have to suffer consequences they never contemplated.  Yet, they come to the parents for a bail out with many affectionate promises.  We suffer right along with them, no, we suffer more.

The emotional an financial consequences to parents are deeper and far more extensive than the young adult cares to imagine.   As adults to whom made their own choices that were not always the best, we can see where a situation is headed. Sadly, the young adult grows deaf as we inquire, reason or suggest. They imagine they are smarter an wiser.  In fact they do not have the ability to see in their mind’s eye that we were young like them.  An they cannot see they will get old like us.

It is good to be there for our loved ones.  Yet, we must be cautious not to have our love exploited. We cannot have trust, faith, an confidence in them to an unfailing degree. They will make choices we would not want them to make. Our children may disappoint us at times.

Imagine the 1950’s era parents an how they suffered with hippy era children. There were not cell phones, so if your young adult went off on an adventure it may have been a long time before knowledge of safety and wellness was recieved.  Each era has it’s benefits and it’s grief.

The conclusion I have come to is that there has never been a perfect parent and there is no perfect child. The only perfect parent is Jehovah and his son Jesus was a perfect child.

When Adam an Eve disobeyed their father Jehovah he was devastated.   Yet, he refused to let his affections leave him defeated.  Jehovah had to step back an leave them to go the way of their own choosing.  Jehovah was a perfect parent, he generously provided for all their needs.  They could have been perfect children yet they threw it away choosing to ignore the warnings from their father.

As Jehovah was a perfect parent an yet his two children with free-will made devasting choices our children too may at times lack appreciation or they may make choices that confound us.  We may be hurt and disappointed.

I believe when our children disappoint us, we need not blame ourselves or our mate.  Some children come around later, and we can have faith they will.  If we invested love, and good training in their upbringing then we can hope they will return to the things beneficial.

We need not be defeated.  We have our own life to continue living with Joy.   It is vital we let go of those with free will and have confidence in their return. We have a responsibility to learn how to live our life well by using our free will in a most beneficial manner being a good example for our children to long to return to.  Are you living your life?

Imagine the interests that were put off to raise children.  It is time to contemplate the interests that were negated and invest in our future as we learn to live a joyful life. Our job is to raise a new generation, let go, live a few years productively until they must return to care for our needs when we are old.  So really, whom has the last laugh.  The elderly as they piss away their dignity with little control so they learn to enjoy the small things in life.

It is important we learn to enjoy small joys and activities while we are still young enough.  Why wait until we are old?  We are not defeated because we know we were not perfect children, we were not perfect young adults and nor were we perfect parents.  So we cannot take it personally when our children make greivious decisions.  Let us live!

 

ENDORPHIN THERAPY 101.

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Runners and walkers alike enjoy great weather and the endorphine benefits of exercize. Gina the  Author when I was young.

As I practice endorphin therapy for natural anti depression and reasonable relief of pain I am learning the difference between healthful endorphin releases and nonhealthful endorphin release.

There is no pain erradication therapy for me through this therapy or medications.  At this point, I do not know a moment without physical an sometimes emotional pain.  Please note that I am not talking about mental illness, clinical depressions, or emotional imbalances.  I do feel empathy for those whom suffer such.  It is my belief that endorphin therapy practiced with purposeful healthful control can be beneficial for all.

When addictions are considered, the effects of endorphins make change so difficult.  I have no specific knowledge or experience as I am not a physician or psychiatrist.  The experience I personally refer to is that “FEEL GOOD” part of the brain.  Growing up my mother made the best chocolate chip cookies and they were a real happy treat.  When we would take a long walk to the icecream bar in the grocery store we were estatic.  She knew how to get us to look forward to things and the realization of it was deeply felt.  We encountered alot of loss, devastation, and physical pain.  The good things were very good, exceedingly good thus setting me up with my own unhealthful forms of endorphin release learned at a very young age.

As I have been practicing this Endorphin Therapy, I am prayerfully considering all things big and small in my life.

Decades ago people were sent to sanitariums and the routine with patient activities provoked healthy endorphin release.

One important aspect to my investigation as to endorphins is to determine healthy and unhealthy.  Not all endorphin activities are healthful.

Healthy activites lead to longterm good feelings, and are beneficial to longterm emotional and mental health.

Unhealthy activities are short term with glee that later brings feelings of guilt, depression or sadness.  One example, a close relative of mine went out with men and had relations with any and all that seemed interested in her.  Yet, she had to visit a psychiatrist regularily to cope with depression over her conscious accusing her because she considered herself a christian and knew God did not like her activities.  She was addicted to her search for love in this wrong way.  She smoked in order to calm her nerves.  She felt empty and she drank heavily to deal with her emotions.  Her drinking and feelings created rage which caused her to be very violent.  The cycle for good feelings resulted in great sadness and emotional pain for her and all of us.  She died lonely at 61 from a heart attack.

Other negative short termed emotional highs are spending money excessively. People do this alot during the holidays and then panic sets in six weeks later when there is no money for the power bill or rent.  The food banks are busy then.  Post Holiday Blues, what should have been good turns out desperately sad.

Drug, alcohol, or any substance abuse are known to peak endorphines, yet, you lose your moral integrity and esteem.

Malfunctioning and mispurposeful use of the power of free will, can pervert the function and purpose of endorphins.

Responsible use of our power for use of Free Will can bring longlasting joy as endorphin releasing activities are being utilized as intended by our Grand Creator.

25 healthy activities TO ENJOY THE BENEFITS OF ENDORphin release:

  1.  Pray each morning for guidance, and Thank our Creator Jehovah for his son and the good in our life.
  2. Eat a healthy meal to start day.
  3. Hug a family member, hold the embrace, express words of endearment and appreciation.
  4. A massage, give one or get one.
  5. Help someone clean their home or yard.  Helping feels good.
  6. Eat an apple or some nuts
  7. Change the decor of one room.
  8. Plan a detailed meal, set the table nice.  Enjoy preparing with good music playing.  Do this even if just for yourself.
  9. Take a walk alone or with a friend, or take a zumba class, or do aerobics.  Dance, Dance.
  10. Listen to opera music or rock.
  11. Plant a garden or have houseplants to care for.
  12. A pet or a farm either one helps us to care for something besides ourself.
  13. A day trip each month to a museum, zoo, or festival.
  14. Go horseback riding or plan a vacation to a dude ranch.
  15. Go to bed early, do a little reading.
  16. Enjoy a nature walk.
  17. Send cards once a week, make a list each week of upcoming anniversaries, a graduation, or thinking of you cards.  Send cards if you hear of anyone in your area that has suffered a loss. Compassion and personal interest in others without expectation of returned kindness is restorative.
  18. Spending time with family and friends can bring about good feelings.  Plan a picnic.
  19. Coffee, or a couple pieces of dark chocolate or a glass of wine.
  20. Sitting in the sun and enjoying nature.  Watching birds and butterflies.  Or a body of water, waves, boats, or kayaking.
  21. Swimming, bowling, playing pool, a trip to library, basket ball games, playing an instrument or golfing each week so as to have this to look forward to.
  22. Read the Books of Psalm and Proverbs
  23. Buy yourself or someone else flowers.
  24. Cleaning the house or yard and enjoying the experience, feeling pleased with the efforts.
  25. Do the craft or hobbie you always wanted to do.  Make time an space for it.  Feel good when each step is accomplished.

Feel exceedingly good about the small simple delights in life.  Endorphins will no longer be shy to come out.  They will make your day and life more Joyful.