husbands

Goals! Attainable Goals, realistic goals. What does it take to accomplish your goals?

Goals, everywhere in the world people set goals for themselves. If you could make two categories which one would you fit in? How do you move from one category that is dissatisfied to one whom is thrilled by his success of accomplishment?

Two categories really? Yes, each category has their own identity. I know which one I am, you decide which one you are. I will only number each one, yet later I will name them .

Group #1. Usually hard working, positive to be around, their home and cars are spotless, they have time to go on trips and can afford it, they read books, they go running or biking most days, their family life seems happy, they can afford what ever they do yet seem a bit frugal. Whatever projects this person has they have no problem seeing it thru almost effortlessly and they are happy.

Group #2. Their brain is hopping, no end to the great ideas they come up with. If you could harness some of what they come up with we would all be rich. They are definately on to new horizons with this weeks ideas. The ones from last week have evaporated, it doesn’t matter they already purchased the supplies for the project because this stuff is pushed to the corner because something new, different, exciting is occupying their mind now. Drawings, lists, and numbers written down, this is a thrill, the best thing they have come up with, everyone gets excited, it looks like a real Go, they buy all they need,then suddenly it all comes to a Stop!. The depression hits, no money for bills, the house and garage are a mess. It is over, time to recover a bit. The money gone, the disappointment, the clutter and the half-dones. In a couple weeks a new charge of energy, sketches, lists, numbers and we are on a new wave. Do not touch my stuff for my other projects, I know what they are and I know where they are and someday I will do them.


Both types of people are fun to be around. You likely know both types. If your a little of both or a lot of one and a little of the other you can imagine the internal struggle it can be.

The Group #1, wins the prize, is #1!! The Doers. Satisfaction guaranteed. They know whom they are, they know what they want, they know how much money they have, they stick to budgets, they know how much time they have.
To be in group one you know it takes consistency to attain all your desires. To be fit you must be consistent w your exercise routine. To have a clean home we must pick up after selves, put things away, wipe surfaces daily, sweep and Vaccume regularly. If we want our car kept nice we cannot keep leaving stuff in the car, keep the car empty and tidy. Do a weekly clean an wash of car, I am working on this.
And if we want money then we don’t just keep buying or keep getting credit. We have a budget and mind our budget. If we want to take trips maybe we don’t eat out for a few months an save money for our trip. (This savings includes not just the travel, food, sights, hotel etc. it includes the amount of lost week of work, plus the amount for bills that would be due for the first couple weeks on return, this way you won’t be knocking on someone’s door because you cannot afford your rent or buy groceries. Keep yourself covered w proper planning).


Group #1 is a group of doers, they consider a project, set up their space, purchase their supplies and have their time planned out to work on the project and if they can work on it a few hours a couple nights a week until done that is how it gets done. Our friend Bob wanted to make a cutting board for his wife using many types of wood. It came out nice. It took a bit. He and his wife loved the finished project.

Group #2, are definately the Dreamers. If they could hire a full time staff to follow the dreamer about to pick up after them, to assist in the projects to finish the projects, to support the dreams it would be a wonderful world. Unless your rich already, we have to stop, focus, plan and be committed to see a project thru. It is a wonderful way to earn self respect by working thru the steps. It is challenging especially when the excitement is gone it is time to exercize commitment, loyalty, and continue even if almost bored. If our minds have already started a new project then we can invest in a project planner an give ourselves a half hour a day to develop our projects yet this does not interfere with our completion of projects we are already on board with. The dedication, follow thru, and daily doing what is required to accomplish the goal. These are qualities like skills that are rewarding. It can get boring, I am working on a tiny necklate scarf. It is boring I want to be working on this an that. Yet each night before bed I do a couple rows, each morning if possible I do a couple rows. Of course I started it with excitement believing it would be wonderful and beautiful. The fact that my mind wants to be knitting a sweater or socks is just normal. I will be so happy when the necklate is done then I can start the sweater knowing at some point I will be perfectly bored ready to be knitting something else. You see, I know this about myself, and I know I have given in to these treacherous feelings before. We know feelings can be misleading. By practicing commitment to our obligations we will be happier in life. If we practice followthru we will have satisfaction from achieving our goals.

For us dreamers, living within our means and not freely purchasing will give us peace of mind and a manageable budget.

It is a good practice to look at half starts of projects, work on them and finish. It makes you feel good and accomplished. It clears clutter and shows self respect.

It takes faith to finish what you start, if your mind is leaping about and leaving a path of half starts how can others take you serious and how can you take yourself serious. I understand, this has been me my whole life. Throughout my life I have started many, discarded many, and it brings grief. Do not allow your children to do this. They need expectations that where if reasonable without pain or degradation that they are encouraged to finish what they start. It builds qualities that will help them their whole life.
There are many projects I started and finished over the years that I was rewarded with joy and satisfaction because it was a worthy project.

By seeing the worth of our project, respecting the investment of time, money, and optimism we initially had we can go from being Just a Dreamer to a Doer! Keep doing, and fulfillment will be your reward! Plan it! Do it! Finish it!

September, All is not at a Loss! Goalsetters, Get Ready!

September, the beginning of fall, where will it take thee’, where can I go…?

September is the fourth to the last month of the year. The ninth month of the year, we still have time. Time is still on our side, if we get busy now.

What goals did you have for 2022? We can still amp it up a bit and get good results. Take time to consider what you thought was important. Are those things still important? Here are a few to improve all aspects of life.

We still have four Fridays and Four Sundays. No, we really only have three Saturdays. Confounding really! This is Monday, September 5th, 2022.

We can put our time to good use. Here are twenty things we can do in September that will help make the next few months go smoother. Make life more enjoyable. We can improve family life and become more satisfied if we just try a few of these or all of them. I would love to hear if someone tries them all consistently til end of the year. Is anyone willing to try all twenty? Yea!!! We can do this!

1. Any outside special cleanup and repairs for our home, property And vehicles. You can make that punch list. Weatherizing before cooler weather. Mulching, glazing, window washing, pressure washing, minor repairs or major. Getting them done will just feel good. It is cool enough to paint the house or trip to improve overall look of the place.

2. Maintenance to lawnmower, bicycles, other equipment. Wash, pump up tires, check the belts, chains, and fluids.

3. Put a check mark on our calendar each day when we get a 20 min or better walk or workout done. A smiley face if you like.


4. Weigh once a week like Tuesday and put that number on your monthly calendar each week. A record to reflect on helps quarterly, or sooner if need be.


5. Plan a trip, a short close by one for a long weekend. Or visit local zoos and museums.

6. Plan a couple Fridays or Mondays off to get some big domestic projects done over a long weekend.

7. Consider a totally new hairstyle, a new refreshing look. Do we still look like we did ten years ago? Can we grow our hair longer or cut it shorter? Go to a stylist and get some professional input. Just nothing high maintenance please. If your hair is already high maintenance can we simplify things and stop doing something that makes it high maintenance? Keep it nice, just try something new.


8. Is there something you can tweak about your diet that could help you feel an look better? A small thing. Cut down on the soda, or increase the water. Have smaller meals and include at least one or two veggie salads per day.


9. A reading goal, read some poetry or even the Bible five minutes a day. Something refreshing each day.

10. Call family weekly, you know the family that you rarely talk to, and you never hear from them. Just call! Say hi! It has been a tough couple years for everyone. Sorry for my neglect., what is going on with you? How is everyone holding up? Then listen. Express care and concern.

11. Time to pull out a hobby or craft, how about finishing that one you started a few years ago. I like doing little quicker projects while I have a bigger project. Keeps it mixed up so I don’t get bored. I do get bored, jump around, get nothing done. You should see all my wonderful drafts of articles I have written and not published. Boo Haw! I will! I really will honor them and finish them.

12. A basketball, tennis ball, or football? Take your pick, they can do nothing without you. Oh, really has it been years…it is not the balls fault. Your not crawling yet. Get busy with it, get active.


13. New recipes please, the food has gotten boring. I will elaborate in a different article. Challenge: Use a real cookbook you own and find a couple recipes to enjoy making.

14. Clean the car, go get it detailed unless your good at detailing it yourself. I am not good at detailing let alone anything else other than keeping gas in the car sometimes. I do respect those w clean cars. Maybe my self respect will improve as I improve. Imagine that equivalent to self esteem. Good decisions, good actions, good results, good esteem.

15. Look at the body, yea, the one in the mirror. Take measurements quarterly and keep track of improvements and the need to improve. I lost 8 inches just w tiny little exercises since last September with no weightloss. Amazing! Don’t obsess! Just do toning exercises. Weightloss, another subject as I have a lot to lose. Always trying, never denying, and one will never lose. Made up by me just now. Some of us could afford to deny less or more.

16. Driving, how is your driving? Do you speed, do you get impatient? Do you get up close to the vehicle in front of you? Do you mess with your phone while driving? We know what we do, distracted driving and accidents are real. Aggressive driving is happening all around us, we do not have an excuse even if the other driver is inconsiderate and rude. We are responsible for what we do. Tickets, accidents, all cost money and time. Keep a good record and you will feel blessed.

17. Gifts anyone? Whom doesn’t like a gift? A gift is nice to give or recieve especially without expectation. A loved one we reside with, can we pick up something not expensive yet meaningful they may like? Or, the gift of time, have they been nagging we get something done that we just almost refuse to do, just do it with a smile and love to bless them and yourself. Don’t make them ask again. They will appreciate what you do even more! Can you arrange with them a long lunch and meet for a light lunch or a coffee? How much does eye contact and a smile cost? Can we try to stop a moment each day and look at each member while they are talking, really see them, really hear them and w a thoughtful response of positivity to validate their concerns or expressions.

18. Board games anyone? I am game, I really love playing cards or a board game w my favorite people. You know whom you are. No phones at table it is rude! Relax, have fun together.


19. It is still early enough in season if you like to go boating or camping or kyacking. It is fun! I do not do those things but my friends whom do are always happy they plan the time.

20. The final Big One! Mathew 5:3 say Happy is the one concerned w their spiritual needs. Include time to Pray to the most High at Psalms 83:18 about all these matters to improve your life in all ways. He really will help you. As you know principles are the backbone of structure. Nothing good can stand without it. As we learn his principles and apply them in daily life we will see the good results.

This is September, we have 17 weeks until the end of the years. Let us finish strong and achieving much so we can gain the esteem that comes with good results. Good results come from consistent efforts.

We can Do It! Finish Well, improve our health, wealth, family life, friendships, environment, spiritual health and esteem. Joy will come, satisfaction will be our gift.


Your Author, Gina Rydin from Fat fit an Fab . Com

fatfitanfab.com

February is not just any February

It is not just another year, it is still the beginning of a year. The first quarter of a year. We have an opportunity to make some positive goals and plans. Is there anything you have been wanting to do to improve your life?

I am thinking of not just immediate things that must be taken care of, or long term goals and things we must do to achieve them or even short term goals. How about little not so important things you have always wanted to do but never get around to doing… .

This February I am trying to focus more on my immediate responsibilities, however … stop, let’s catch our breath a little.

What point am I taking my sweet time to get to?

For example let me see if you can guess:

I was doing a zoom ministry with a friend this morning. Her husband came home from work. He took the kids to the zoo, What?! During these Covid times???!!!. Yes, Hurray! The young mother was able to stay home for a little R&R. The husband got a break from work and was able to enjoy a happy time with his kids. The Zoo’s are still open and need support. This world is breaking an falling apart and here this little family made time for a sensible happy time. I am impressed!

This evening, I walked with a teenager to her home because I did not want her walking home at dusk alone. (I forgot to wear my ankle supporters! How painful. However visiting with a young person on a walk was healthful and enjoyable). As I neared my home a couple neighbors I had not previously met came out an visited with me on the street. They mentioned how they see me going for Occasional walks and how delighted they are that usually have a friend on the phone on the speaker and I am gabbing an laughing. She said that it makes them so happy to see. She told me she would like to walk with me gabbing and laughing. I said, “let’s do! It’s a sanity keeper.”

As I see I have some piles here and there…where do they come from? I have no one to blame. Having a busy mind and life with many interests you can only imagine. Mindfulness, something that has eluded me for half a century.
My husband has deteriorating health and I am trying to maintain some mental health during these trying times.
I find doing little activities like a game, Pick a Pile. That is the name of my game. It is helpful and the situation domestically is slowly improving. Put away, throw away. You cannot believe how much needs to be put away or thrown away.
One such little pile had a antique fold up chair with no seat or back. I have owned it most of my adult life and it has needed repair most of that. I decided that I need to do what I have been needing to do for a long time, if I have appreciation for the chair I need to just finish it. Now, while sitting with my husband I am doing some stapling an hot glueing in hope to have a sturdy sit worthy chair. As I am a good sum heAvier than my husband I had him sit on the chair to make sure the seat I put together would hold. It held him just fine. My seat may be too much for this little chair to bear so I am putting that on hold as I try to lighten up a good sum.
In conclusion I would just like to say, we have our lists of things we never get around to. Making just a little time for something refreshing is good for our state of mind and well being. This little list has rediculous unnessessary things that I have always on the back of my mind. There are scriptures that say Make sure of the more important things and I believe we should do that 95% of the time. However, the Bible also says we need to sing, dance and laugh that these things are important too.

If you would like a few suggestions:

  1. Go to a zoo on an day that it may not be busy. Be cautious. Your discretion.
  2. Take a walk
  3. Practice the piano or an old instrument that is gathering dust.
  4. A hobby you may have let go of, give yourself a couple afternoons a month to enjoy.
  5. Bible reading and prayer, Mathew 5:3 says Happy is the person conscious of their spiritual needs. This deserves a more important role in our routine.
  6. Getting some light exercize more regularly
  7. Making time for fresh air and sunshine improves our outlook.
  8. Take a break from the computer, phone and tv one night a week, what would a person really do without those? How did mankind live these thousands of years?!😂
  9. Making time to interact with our loved ones talking and listening with eye contact. Of course no phones. Light conversation with words of appreciation. Relationships with our mate, parents, children and siblings need and deserve the investment. ( A side note: people in loneliness go out looking for new relationships instead of taking care of those right there already needing and wanting them. Isn’t that interesting.).

It is my hope you are encouraged. Be blessed.
written by Gina Rydin


Friends make life more tolerable and bring joy.

Friendships definately stimulate joy in our lives.  How do we make friends in the cyber world?  How about an old fashioned face to face contact, conversations and good times.

Loniliness is an actual problem for many. Life’s responsibilities keep most so busy they only have time to carry out their domestic duties and get rest when the next day presents the same.

Of course some are very shy and do not know how to get the conversation ball rolling and keep it rolling and for how long.

With good things there are always limits, boundaries, and rules of respect.

Imagine if one friend works and has children she is definately going to have less time then an older semi-retired person with no children.  So if you want to visit with her, invite them all over and have a meal ready with no requirements of her.  Understand children have bedtimes, homework, and she may still have washing to do for the week.  Do not be hurt that she must leave so soon?  You did help and your friendship means a lot.

I love spending time with my friends.  My friend Susan made lovely cards and has organized an old fashioned tea party on Sunday afternoon.  Exciting.

My friend Danielle and her daughter are learning how to sew from me and are progressing quite well. We love spending time together while being productive.  We are all learning new things.

Valerie is teaching me how to Garden, she is amazing.  I kinda get out of the way, she moves fast and confidently as I hang around wanting to help and I am not useful.  She has taught me so much and the garden is lovely. We have good times together talking and laughing.  Her household goes to bed early so although we could hang out til they kick us out or make another bed, we strive to be considerate and leave not too later than their usual bedtime.  😂

I do not like to ask people how they are because it is an unfair question.  The rule of thumb is to smile and say good or fine while you may be dying inside.

I like to ask what a person has coming up next week, or did they recently do anything enjoyable.   Last evening I asked Danielle if she had anything fun coming up?  She said she and her husband, son and daughter were going to an dinasaur exhibit.  I think that is so exciting.  I look forward to our conversation after they have experienced this.

We must be more interesting than the internet.  Instead of watching movies, playing games on phone, internet cruising, and such.  Learn to live your life!  Be the heroine of your own story instead of passively letting it pass you by.  Imagine how many hours are wasted on the internet or television.  Add them up if you dare.  Time runs out of the day, week, months and years. Yes, our life can passively pass us by.

By doing activities, we become interesting.  For instance, I finally lost a couple pounds, only a couple.  It was enough to wear my floral linen dress   I wore it and was happy for a little bit, until I realized the side splits came up half my thigh.  As soon as I got home I got my box of grommets out and while talking to my almost 26 year old son, Brock is my middle son which always has it’s advantages, and my husband.  The unusual course of things is they think I do not know how to do things   They cannot resist taking over and have great fun doing it.  So he took everything from me and now he was setting the grommets into my dress side slits where I had marked   When he was nearing finish He said, “as usual mom, you start things you do not know how to do, good thing I came around”, and he has one eyebrow up for emphasis.  It took everything to keep from laughing hysterically.   I then said to John, my husband, “how come you did not say it was your turn to set some grommets like when I made my striped bag you too fought over your turns like little children?!”.  He just looked at me as I giggled about the both of them.   If I want to set the grommets, I have to take my things and hide under a tree.  Yet, these men, my husband and sons create such entertainment I think This is truly called living.  Being involved in activities together.  Oh,  my dress looks cute with the shoe lace look, I used embroidery threads and put beads on.

I asked my husband what was one thing he noticed and liked about me.  His reply was, “you were always doing something, and no matter what was going on with you or around you, you were always so chipper and happy”.  I thought that was great because that is how I am.

Quit reading about others so much, live a life worth writing about in your own journal.  Write down something positive someone said to you, or a good outcome of something you worried about.  I like to combine my journal with my calendar and master lists for weeks and months so my accomplishments and direction or focus is all together in one place.  I am thru trying to buy journals and calendars.  There are none perfect and they run out of months.  Living my life includes making a personal everlasting journal/calendar/masterlist binder I can add to an take away from all I like.

Set up your challenge and stick to it.  Mine is Daily Bible reading, daily practice of simplified domestic schedule, sewing, gardening and painting regularly.  Oh, do not forget hospitality.  Invite ones to meet for coffee, or to library for a book on a place you want to vacation.  Greece or Peru, I cannot afford to go but I can plan my ideal trip anyway and pray about it.

The point is, Be your own friend first, go to museums, concerts, learn to dance, learn a hobby, fill your time with wholesome activities.  Friends will naturally come in time.  We are not desperate for friends, that makes us vulnerable and stupid.  Be discerning and do not immediately befriend anyone.   Do not drop your life story on anyone the first few times you meet and do not feel the need to pull personal information from them.  It all comes in time.  If someone has undesirable traits that concern you, gently mention it and give them the benefit of doubt.  Yet, we have no right over others.  Their choices are their own to make.  I like to show from the Bible how God, Jehovah and his son, Jesus feel about the matter.  This way it is not my opinion or preference.  People are not perfect and I am far from perfect.  Allow people to be themselves.  Sometimes friends come and go.  Yet, some will stick with you through the years.

Living our life, being God’s friend, our own friend, a friend to our family, and others will freely draw near and it is a delightful journey.

Now, my domestics need attention, then I will stop an sew or paint later this afternoon.  Live! Live! Today.

Brent an Britteny married on July 20, 2016. Despite the storms of life, they found Love and Bravely face their future together with Jehovah as their stronghold.

b765a4026bb3e082beb8e060cfb7216b

Brent an Britteny Bishop

Congratulations on your choice to Marry a person in the faith that you can share your life with forever.  Always be kind and considerate to each other.  Consideration practiced in daily life is part of the bond of love.  You two are loved by many.

Another Year Gone By. Happy Prospects Despite:

There is so much is happening in this world, some things are frightening and depressing.  Many are personally touched by tragedy.  Yet, we have a life to live.  As long as we are alive we have a responsibility to be happy.  Some get happiness mixed up with selfishness or me ism.  It is not the same.

If we have a roof over our head, a bed to sleep in, and our basic necessities met, we have a lot to appreciate.  I am not going to depress you with facts and figures about all those whom do not have their basic needs met.  More people than you think have experienced homelessness or other sad situations.  What I would like to suggest is that we can afford to feel a measure of contentment and appreciation.  Contentment and appreciation are Happiness manufactures.  If a person only wants more and they do not see the good in their life with great appreciation, they will never be happy.  When our sons were small and life was so difficult and there was no money to pay the power bill, I still told the boys we were richer than most.  We were.

Another Happiness factor is quit looking elsewhere for what you may already have.  Invest in your mate, children, home, job, and community.  Some are not happy with their mate, what happens then.  Children grow up emotionally detached if we do not regularly communicate with them.  They can become vulnerable because of feeling unloved and lonely.  Everyday, our mates and children need us to Stop!  Look! and Listen!

What would you like to accomplish in the next quarter, 1/2 year point, third quarter?  This first quarter we definitely can start early figuring out our taxes.  An exercise routine is good to get busy with.  This next quarter I want to get some household decorative issues taken care of, finish painting, get some wood work done.

Having a schedule, and quarterly goals keeps me inspired and optimistic.  You cannot be happy if you do not have hope.  There is so much in life we have no power to control.  It is critical that we have short terms goals and long term goals.  Every day consider what step you can take to work toward the accomplishment of your goal.  A short term/longterm goal I have is the practice of productivity in my sewing and painting areas.  I am eager to get more productivity and results regulary.

Productivity restores a sense of well being to the mind.  If a person is layed off, retired, or disabled, productivity is still a necessity.  Some suffer with depression, the loss of employment or an ongoing sad situation can get us down.  Keeping a domestic schedule with some social activities keeps one from isolating themselves.  Productivity causes one to feel accomplished.  Even something as simple as cleaning out one drawer in the kitchen and organizing it gives me pleasure.  Cleaning and organizing a shelf a night in the pantry or the refrigerator creates good feelings.

Assessing responsibilities, and fulfilling them, benefits all.

Considering the application of some of these behaviors, attitudes and habits can cause you, me, and our loved ones to feel happiness.  I desire that as you proceed into this new year that some of your hopes, and goals are fulfilled.                       Gina

 

 

 

Lonely, How can a person get thru the next few days?

Do you ever feel lonely?   Why are you lonely?  Are you alone, or are you in a family and lonely?  Lonely, when there is so much to consider.  Why am I lonely, is it because I am alone?  What can I do to enrich this moment so I no longer feel alone?  Some people are alone, they live alone, and they may not live in the same community as their family.  Families are estranged too often which also contributes to aloneness.  For whatever reason, being alone is not healthy if that is a continuous situation.

If your alone because your mate works a lot or is involved in a lot of activities than have you mentioned that you would like to spend more time with them.   Mention it briefly without weaponry.   The other day, I mentioned to my oldest son whom is married and lives only about 15 minutes away that I am sad we are not able to stop in when we are in the area.  They both work full time, and their lives are so busy that they really do not appreciate people dropping by without calling ahead of time.  They are right.  I think I offended him in the way I commented about it, and he felt I was laying a guilt trip.  That was not my intention and it only further served up sad feelings and frustration that it was received that way.  Therefore, I have no recommendations on how to communicate your feelings.   Just let a person know you would like to spend more time with them and leave it at that.  If your mate is very busy, what activities can you do to be more busy?  Are you fulfilling all your personal and domestic responsibilities?  Join a knitting group or painting group at your local senior citizen center, they would love to have you there even if you are not a senior.  Each week have a day to visit local sites such as museums, gardens or parks, the library or bookstore.  Invite your mate, they may surprise you and take a vacation day off to join you.  The more busy you are, the more accomplished you become, the more you have to talk about, the more interesting you become.  Plan out the month ahead for yourself, then do them.  Keep your calendar visible so your mate can see what your interested in.  This is not to promote independence, it is only living a healthy life.

If you do not have a lot of relationships because you are new to an area then you must understand it takes time to build a relationship.  You do not have to sacrifice your morality or defraud your budget to have a relationship.  Dutch is best, your only in control of you.  Dutch means there are no misconceptions or hidden expectations.  You are nice because you go, be your own transportation.  You never have to prove how nice you are or how interesting or knowledgeable you are.  Yes, whom says you will even like the other party after you get to know them for a while.  So, do not put your morality or money on the line.  Integrity lost in an thoughtless eve can take years to retrieve.

When I am alone, I love projects.  What projects do I have on my agenda right now?  If you are my friend and I assume you are, I would tell you…

My dresser top which is about five feet long had everything it shouldn’t have on it for far too long.  The mirror fell behind the dresser a couple years ago, and because I am overweight, I did not care to look anyway.  Last week,  I decided to remedy the mess and took a couple piles of clothes off and put away, then I consolidated the perfumes and lotions. (Far too many) I do not need to buy more perfumes or lotions according to “The Life-Changing Magic of Tidying Up” expert Marie Kondo.  She advocates tossing most of what you have.  I do not agree with that point since I like what I have and I have the room for it.  I did access what I have with no pressure and made a mental note to use what I have.  There were a few things I chose to toss, and that I had got all the use I wanted from them.  Her program is great, I have just finished the second of  four cd’s from her series I received a couple weeks ago.

As I continued to group and organize my belongings of what was on my dresser top my husband John came in and looked at me and mentioned that ‘wasn’t it time I think about making dinner’.  I agreed that it was a good time to make dinner and that since he could see I was productively busy, couldn’t he make dinner.  Really, I did have the rice an vegetables done in the Black an Decker RC436 type 1, that our son Brock gave us for our anniversary last year.  John, he looked at me when I suggested he let me continue working.  He saw the bed was loaded up with piles of clothes, papers, and junk jewelry.  He left and went to the kitchen likely shaking his head wondering if I would get to clearing the bed.  When I went and stirred the rice which is periodically needed so as not to stick to bottom of cooker, I was pleased to see him using a cookbook trying to decide how he was going to marinate the wild caught salmon he purchased.  As I put away, tossed, or organized  I found things I had been missing.  Now the dresser was lovely again, I could see the dresser scarf I made a few years ago with a precious piece of jacquard fabric that I surged a nice edge on.  So satisfying, and the meal was very satisfying too.  He was very pleased.  The mirror is up, I feel looking into it is not so offensive.  One project done.  Is there a project nagging you to get done, make time now.

Another project is that I am trying to make a nice pair of denim sage green pants.  A good quality fabric always makes it worth doing.  Purchased pants no longer come up to the waist, and that is what I like, a hi-rider.  Do you sew?  Many men and women sew of all ages.  It can be frustrating at times, bobbins pop up, needles break or the fit is not right.  Fix it and keep sewing.  Finally the pants look like nice pants, just need to hem them.  That is not all, the frustrating part is that I have to take the yoke I designed off the back, and decrease a few inches because thankfully, they are too large at where the lower back is.  A couple darts and a zipper are required then, incorporating the lovely yoke is a creative challenge I am mentally working out.

A lot of rest I have needed in the last couple weeks due to extremely low blood pressure, fevers, and exhaustion.  When your dizzy, you should lay down so you do not fall down.  With a cut on the bottom of my left foot, whom wants to walk a lot anyway.  The infection in left leg seems to finally be healing.  Almost.  Sounds so dreary really.  Projects keep my mind busy.  Do you have projects?  Proverbs 31 suggest them greatly.

Loneliness, do you send cards?  Snail mail is the best, support our Post Offices and they will not be a thing of the past.  I value the sweet cards I receive and letters, and I send a lot of cards and letters every week.  I send cards and sometimes gifts to complete strangers.  If I hear someone does well at something, or if someone is sick, or suffers a loss, then a card is what I can do to support mankind.  Expressing commendation where it is truly due, or compassion, empathy and support, that is something any of us can do.  My handwriting suffers due to rheumatoid, so I prayerfully choose my words, and then I write a brief note.  The Tuesday Morning stores have beautiful stationary at affordable prices.  TJ Maxx, or The Ross are other department stores that also sell cards and or stationary at decent prices.  Do not wait for a card or wait for kindness or thoughtfulness.  When you send a card or small letter, send with prayers, hopes, but no expectations.  Every week cards or letters go out, and usually a few come in.  So sweet, the treasure trove of thoughtfulness can be in quiet moments.  Being alone enjoying expressions of someone now gone is also a healing.  The mother whom raised me, (some day I will explain that) sent me a letter with ten dollars suggesting I go get a dessert for the boys and I that we would ordinarily not do because of cost.  She lived far away.  We did as she suggested and that was so very sweet.  She has been gone for possibly twelve years now.  I have that little letter which I kept in a little box that I recently discarded, now it is put in a little book of knitting socks, and periodically a couple times a year I pull the letter out , read and weep.  Yes, she has no idea how meaningful the gift was then and how it still affects me now.

When the boys were toddlers, there I was now a single mother with three.  With no family to turn to, no child support, loneliness was a common occurrence.  Being overwhelmed with financial responsibilities, working contract work in the field of architecture and construction, life was feast or famine.  From mid November until about February, there were little opportunities to work, so I became an expert at stretching the dough.  One time, I earned three dollars too much to qualify for any assistance.  Others seemed to be doing so well on assistance, and we were getting evicted with no where to go.  I always have had my faith and many times my brothers and sisters in our faith were the ones to come to the rescue.  For that I am so appreciative.  I found it so humiliating to be in need and strived to handle our problems on my own.  There were times I was so lonely it was almost crippling.  Having projects even then was so helpful.  I made the most adorable denim and suede coats for my sons.  Proud I wanted them to be, and I wanted them to feel equivalent to those around, and I would tell them although we did not have bucks in the wallet, we were still richer than most.  I would take them to the Home Depot classes for children to learn how to make things.  They loved it, and it built healthy esteems in them too.  As adult men, they design and build whatever they want.  Blake designed a wonderful bed, dresser, closet unit, and it even had secret drawers.  I was so impressed.  He knows he can design and make what he needs when he wants.  It saddened me when they disassembled it.  Brock designed a treehouse with an elevator that goes up.  He lives there.  When people stop in, they always want him to take them up in the elevator to see the treehouse.   Brent, he is now a plumber, and he buys, fixes, sells, and trades cars.  He designed an entertainment center the whole length of the wall in his bedroom 14′ long, that was interlocking with no screws or nails.  Now he has designed an L shaped dresser, entertainment center, that also has cubbies for ties, and a shoe organizer.  He is striving to finish that.  So proud I am that we struggled through the hard times optimistically enduring.  They are three adults, sons that have proved to be survivors.  Do you have a single parent that you work with or live near?  Can you give them a gift card for a tank of gas, or an oil change, or a Walmart gift card for new shoes an socks for all, or haircuts, or coats.  With no expectations, a gift lifts both the giver and receiver.  Commendation also goes a long way.

So crafts may not be your thing, you do not want a mess.  How many people have guest rooms set perfectly up with the hopes of company that never comes.  I am a great advocate of the futon because it folds up into a couch and is a comfortable bed when need be.  My friend Michelle let me stay at her home unexpectantly for two an a half weeks when my father died.  I had just had another surgery and felt incapable of being on my own with a rented car an a place to stay, a short term amnesia besides the sadness of the situation and unnecessary family  drama, I was happy to have her generous support and the futon was comfortable too.  This was her and her husband’s office which was occasionally used as a guest room when need be.  Turning the guest room into a multipurpose room means you can keep your sewing machine set up.  Make yourself a blouse, or a pillow for a friend etc.  Or set up a small area to make jewelry or some other thing you have been interested in.

These next few days can be rough on some, take advantage of the extra time and learn something new, take a walk, call an old friend, finish something, or clean out your cabinets.  Make a list and work it.  I am starting to read the Bible book of Acts, I heard it is inspiring.  For some of these activities, being alone is a Godsend.

 

 

 

November, only Four weeks long, what will we do with our time ….

November, so much to consider.  Seasons changing, time changing, attire changing, does anything stay the same?

Some things are good to keep the same, it is nice to be able to depend on a few things.  Five Sundays and five Mondays, do not be blue about Mondays.  We have five Sundays to catch up on rest, or chores, or projects.  Mondays are known as the start of things, what can we start?

Before it gets too late into the month we can call family members an see how they are doing.  Make time to visit long distant family members or send a card.  Has there been an estrangement?  Forget the issue, there are many reasons why, and they are not important as the years fly by.  Things can be misrepresented, misunderstood, misadvised, and just totally misdone.  Likely all feel sorry.  Yet, all miss out when there is an estrangement.  Reach out, remember the good, heal the breach, reconcile.  My ex father in law called Sunday and it has been years, I did not even recognize his voice until he laughed.  Nice visit on the phone.

Movies at this time of year are all so inspiring regarding spread the love, be kind to strangers, etc.  Love your neighbors, love your family and love strangers, put it into action.  Yet, be safe, do not be unwise.  People experience all sorts of fraud at this time of year because they want to be “good deed doers..”  as said on Wizard of Oz.  We can be responsible humans, considerate to fellowman, and if we consider ourselves Christian than Be that Christian the scriptures describe regarding the New Personality.  My father said, “Be what you say.”  His 7th grade education was weightier than an expert in a said field.  If you feel you are honest, then be honest, if you feel you are moral, than be moral.  If you feel you are loving, be loving.

Think of a goal, such as consider your prime responsibilities in life, are you a Husband, Wife, Father or Mother?  Consider how you can be better at that.  It is easy to assume we have it down pat and there is no need for improvement, but there is always room for improvement.  All can be more loving, more helpful, express love more often and show appreciation.  Help out with the expenses by not being so expensive to maintain.  Contribute more to the household by doing chores to help your mate with what they would normally do.  If there is more than one, than one alone should not be fixing the meals and doing the cleanup.  Help, do something, help with the dishes, or sweep or clean the bathroom.  Surprise your loved one with an unexpected card or a small gift, or meet them for lunch.  I met my son for lunch and we only arranged it an hour before.  It was so nice spending time with him at a restaurant close by his work.  He will be 23 this month and I cannot believe my middle son has grown to be such a wonderful adult.

My goal for November is to improve my part of all relationships I value.  Allot can happen in November, you can warm up your life.  “Be what you say!”