Being Inspired and Inspiring others

Radiating warmth, comes from a mind and heart full of optimism for the well being of all you come in contact with.

The fact that hardships abound and there is no discrimination.  We cannot know the pain in another’s heart.

We cannot solve others problems, yet, we can lift another’s spirits.  It may be possible to help them see other choices available.  The power of making choices based on the best of options and possible outcomes can improve our life.

Fear can blind us to the options we have.  We can feel so limited because of our situation.  Threatening situations can keep us bound, like we come up with all the reasons to avoid a change. Imaging our situation will become worse, and yes it could.  Yet, a change is just that, a change.   It could change for the better as well.

Supporting another’s progress whether it is weight loss, or a cleaner home, or a more positive attitude is supporting a better society. We must invest in each other joyfully and optimistically.

A friend of mine is so perky, generous, optimistic.  She is refreshing.  I have been gravitating toward positive people. It is great having her in my life.

At times we have people in our life that are so emotionally taxing.  Emotional heavyweights are just that, how can we help them to have a different view of life?  Sometimes we cannot help another with their viewpoints or problems.  We may be the heavyweight ourself with the serious problems.  Our circumstances may seem daunting.  There may not always be clear answers.  We can always reconsider advice previously offered.  I have not always been ready to change, then privately, I think and pray about it.   There are times I try a new way and am benefitted.  It is easy to understand why change is so difficult.  I am a reforming near-hoarder.   Sometime, I will tell you about it.   People have tried to advise, counsel, and emotionally force a change.  Only the last couple years have I figured it out with the help of some good programs. Change can feel like a very drawn out process.  I want to be better now!  Ok, I am better now because I am making the adjustments.  Impatient with myself because I know how I want to be, and change is a practice, not a wish.

We might feel bad that we cannot help another, we after all have our own responsibilities and problems.  The Bible says we will carry our own load.  If we are on the phone every day hearing about another’s troubles, and we are so emotionally involved we get stressed how can we adequately attend to our own.  Imagine if we have a mate and children and we use the time we should be attentive to them to be stressed about another’s problems while neglecting those we should be actively loving.

Friendships are essential to emotional health.  A friend is someone that we can enjoy activities with, talk with, enjoying a positive interchange.  I have some friends whom are optimistic, they have not given up on me.  Their faith in me is essential and supports my growth.  I have a belief that a hand-up policy is the best.

Some enter our life suddenly like a breeze.  Refreshing their ways are and we  blessed.  In many ways we feel capable again.  We look forward realizing change and joy are possible.   They are an answer to a prayer. Just as suddenly they have moved on, but we were blessed.

Thank you to all whom have had faith in me, loving me despite.  Thank you!

Gina

 

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The Last Quarter. We can make meaningful changes in our life.

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Chili with Cheddar Chive Scones          by Gina at fatfitanfab.com

October, is the start of our last quarter as we are near the end of another year. Sometimes we can feel time is running out, what can we do with the time left?

People can get so wrapped up in exterior activities whether extracurricular activities for their kids, holidays, politics, that just living life has lost it’s meaning.  Being overly committed and obligated can cause us to be well-spent emotionally, financially, and with our time.

Routines are a practice that may not always be honestly rewarding.  If it is our practice to watch television for three or four hours before bed so as to relax it is a choice.  Is there a more rewarding choice?  My husband bought a lathe for woodworking at a yard sale.  Brock, 23, after work has been coming home from work making beautiful cups and bowls.  He is enjoying it and it is rewarding.  Is there an activity whether creative or purposeful that would be beneficial to do a night or two each week?

I am naturally a clutter bug, yet, my floors are clean.  Piles, piles still occupy the perimeter of many spaces in our home.  How they get there, where they come from, I can never see it happening, yet, I am the culprit.  As I am practicing better habits, not adding to the problem, it still happens.  I have been working on an area outside my painting area or artist corner.  It seems my creative forces has emerged from the room and congested beyond the room.  Is there an excuse?  I have an empty cabinet in there, and drawers half full, and the books put up on top of the cabinet.  These are all holdups and blocks to my creativity.

In the evening I have been putting on good music and working in there a few minutes, turning it into a real artists retreat.  Privately, I am a bit turned off by the junky furniture.  It is all like new, it is just pressed board stuff you could get cheap.  I love good wood.  If it was made the same of walnut, or cherry, as you can see, I am a brat.

I feel so much appreciation for this area I have, when there have been times in my life where I did not have an artists den.  So, I want to occupy the space since my secret is out about the furniture which looks new.  I am ashamed of myself for such notions.  That represents life too, maybe we have notions that hold us up.

“If only I were thin I would” do this or wear that;  If only I had an exercize machine or a membership;  if only someone loved me I would do this; if only my home was like this I would invite people over; if only my mate would  buy me flowers or be more romantic.  “If Only”!!!.  We can be set back with thinking like this.

An exaggerated answer to the “If Onlies.”  My son says this is an oxymoron.  There is no plural to the concept of only.  He could be correct, but for purposes he may be slow to understand, he still says we have a ton of “if only” in our life.  It is plural no matter how you put it.  John says, “If only the dog didn’t stop to crap in the road I would not be late to work.”  As we debate on proper or improper use.  I would still like to make a long awaited for point.

If only I were thin I would wear more chic outfits.  When I was in my low 130’s I fretted because I was not in my low 120’s,  then prednisone gave me an extra 45lbs that compounded the problem, ashamed I wore thrift store duds.  I wouldn’t buy the close I really liked because I did not deserve it til I lost some weight.  Now, at 205 lbs and on antiobotics and other meds my weight is still going up despite my efforts.  I am buying and have been buying new garments that are tasteful and comfortable.  I feel better no longer stressing over this “If Only” business causes years to go by wasted.

If only, is a matter of procrastination.  It makes our excuse sound valid.  Invite friends to your home even though it is not perfect.  It they are your friend they will pitch in an help with no judgement or just have a good time.

Do not wait for a bouquet of flowers and romance.  Buy the flowers yourself, and buy a new tie or dress socks for your man, and give a card expressing appreciation for all his hardwork and love.  Gifts are gifts, not a matter of exchange.  Do not wait for romance, create it.  If they miss the point of our ovature at least they know we love them.  They likely need us to romance them more than we need them to.  Just remember, when our mate works long days, their minds may not be thinking about romance, their romance is their sacrifice going out working to put the roof over our head and food on the table.  It is a valid gift that is not appreciated often enough. It can be more stressful or even degrading then we realize for them at work.  Let them come home to a big smile, a warm hug, with respect and appreciation.  We may be the only thing that puts joy an motivation in our mates life.  Women whom work like this benefit the same as men do by the unexpected gifts, or words of appreciation.

So, instead of over extending ourselves needlessly, let us look at our life.. can we see what routines or habits can be modified so as to bring greater joy and accomplishment in our life.  By switching things up a couple nights a week.  Whether by inviting others over, doing extra cleaning, getting ahead on our taxes, going for early evening walk, doing a craft or hobby we enjoy.  We can examine our life by finding ways to destress, and declutter.

We have someone come in an clean once a week doing things that are hard for me.  It is a necessity. And it helps me to get more done.

How about a trip to the zoo before it gets too cold, or the museums, or the library.  Let us make use of this month to get a few things back on track.  We will have pride an joy instead of depression.

This is a very stressful quarter for many. Slow down, save your money, enjoy the great outdoors. End the year doing the things you promised yourself you would be doing when the year started.

fatfitanfab.com

June is running by ….July approaches …

June is running by, and half the year is now behind us.  What do we still have to do?  Is there anything we wanted to accomplish this year?

It is a good time to refer back to our Goal List for the year.  Three areas I like to consider

  1.  Health and Fitness Goals.
  2. Relationships
  3. Domestic

1.  Health and Fitness Goals:  Let us expound on the most typical goal for the year, Health and Fitness.  Each year we get older and even young people are experiencing health problems.  We will not even discuss the newfound issues with healthcare and insurance costs.  The high monthly costs of mandatory insurance is causing many to avoid visits to the doctor because of high copays and deductibles.  If there was not a good enough basis for a healthy diet and regular exercise, there is more motivation now.

We have one body, and our health we must seek to protect it.   Wise choices, no extremes are necessary.  Fruits and vegetables never go out of fashion and are readily available in most markets.  It only takes moments to use a regular blender to make a nutritious cool drink.  Would you like to know my recipe for a quick tasty fruit smoothie?

One I have been using for literally decades is, I will call it:

Fruit Frapp by Gina @  fatfitanfab.com

one serving recipe:              6 oz orange juice, (not from concentrate), or 6 oz of water. a banana, a peeled apple, and one cup of frozen berries.  Put in the blender, put on for 40 seconds to a minute an a half.    If you do not want to use a bannana, you can substitute a cup of fresh-cut papaya.

The banana or papaya give the drink a smoothness like a shake.  The frozen fruits may have raspberries in which do have seeds.  They remain like seeds. I just swallow them.  If a person has digestive issues like diverticulitis the seeds may bother them so you may choose just a strawberry/blueberry mix.

Be careful if you have diabetes or blood sugar problems.  Only you know if you can have citrus, some medications are a problem.  As I am not a doctor or nutritionist, I am only sharing a recipe which helps me to get my vitamin C, other vitamins, and natural fiber.

I like to make vegetable smoothies in the late afternoon before I start making dinner, that I can sip which can get the edge off hunger and be quite satisfying.  My cardiologist did recommend simply having a V8 each day.  I do not have a great tasting vegtable smoothie that is quick to make.  I do like spinach, a clove of garlic, a handful of fresh parsley, two carrots, and a celery stalk with the leaves.  I do use a pinch of salt because I naturally have low blood pressure.  Then I blend in my regular blender.

Responsible self-care involves regular exercise.  With all the responsibilities people have in their life it can be a real challenge to cull out the time to take a walk, or take a bike ride, or use an exercize machine.  Yet, it is relaxing, destressing, and exhilarating.  Not only can it help us to maintain our weight, it can help prevent us from gaining more weight if that is our objective.  If our objective is to lose weight, than exercising daily with a plan can help us reach our goals.  I had ankle surgery on my right ankle in the beginning of February.  It all seems so slow to heal.  Both ankles have each had two surgeries.  As much as I want to take off and go for a run, or go for a walk it is just not reasonable at this point.  I purchased a bike and I have been striving to go for a ride a few times a week.  The heat is unbearable for daily rides and I am unfit.  Should I call myself unfit?  Maybe that is harsh to label myself as unfit since I do regularly do daily stretching and isometric exercises in my home.  OK, I will accept the congrats! for maintaining my regular stretching and isometric exercize program for decades.  The exercizes I do help me to deal with chronic pain associated with lupus, and rheumatoid arthritis.  I have a lot of muscle spasms and nerve pain.  The exercize helps me to feel that I am taking responsibility for what I can control.  The exercize benefits me also because I like to have a scoop of ice cream, and I have diabetes, therefore, exercize keeps the sugar manageable.

Each health situation is different, but so many suffer.  If we take some time to consider our own situation, and start right away to manage our health before more serious problems develop.  Not only can we keep our healthcare costs down, we may feel better.

2.  Relationships:  Relationships affect our peace of mind.  The relationship we have with our creator, with ourself, with our loved ones and if we are employed than we have our social relationships.  Can we improve all these relationships?

The relationship a person has with their creator can affect how they also feel about themselves and how they live their life and the consequences etc.  I have no more to say on that subject.  It is worth considering privately.

The relationship we have with ourself is very complicated indeed.  So much of how we feel about our-self is deeply rooted from our conception, our upbringing, the family situation, the make up of the family dynamics.  Some come from secure family situations, that is very rare these days.  Some of us are very wounded from broken homes, lack of security, an absent parent, and some experience abuse.  All these factors shape us.  Yet, we do not have to be defined permanently by any of these situations.

Earning a healthy esteem is a very valid concept that I have lived by for decades.  We may remain sensitive or fragile.  Yet, I think of a flower that appears to be fragile, sure, someone may be cruel and pull some petals off.  If the flower is left alone, it can even go thru a thunderstorm with high winds and still remain beautiful.  Someone may pull our petals off, but we must remain rooted in what we know and what we can do.  We can bloom again and if necessary, we can be the seed that blows in the wind, and be rooted elsewhere.  The sun, the rain, will come again.  A positive attitude and hope are fortifying.

When I went thru some health dilemmas this last year, the effect had a stifling effect on me.  I felt incapable and unable.  I quit writing, painting, making bread, and sewing became a rarity.  Cleaning the bathroom mirror I wondered if it was done right.  No one was doing this to me, and I cannot blame anyone.  The doctor whom helps me with my life management skills regarding my attention deficit, he helped me to realize that something was rooted in my youth.  He said, “OK, you do not want to blame anyone, you do not want to blame it on something in your youth, mistreatment you endured.  Yet, you do acknowledge you were not in ideal circumstances to grow a healthy esteem, you did not feel safe, and your accomplishments were met with disfavor by those whom should have been proud of you.  If you can accept this, you can move on.  You can find a new way to respond to your accomplishments.”  Of course, I did not have a tape recorder and it may not be a perfect word for word account.  That was the basic jist of it.

To get thru all of this, I kept the habit of making my Master List for the month and the week.  I referred to them often.  A book from the Library on Productivity that I referred to in one of my previous published articles suggested that when I make my TO DO List that I leave room between each to put a couple of actions that are logically needed to accomplish the task.  This really helped me to get more done.  Feel Good Feeling!  My friend Mattie has an infectious cheer about her and giggle.  She is all about giving yourself a cheer when you complete something.  I am trying it, and it feels good.  My husband John likes to stand back and look at what he has done, you can see his pride well up even with the smallest of accomplishments.  I use to look at him in wonder when I would walk up and find him doing so, in fact, because I did not understand it, I thought it was downright silly and it made me a bit uncomfortable.  Over the years, I have slowly come to understand this gift.

Did you know that at the end of each day of creation, our Great Creator would say “It is Good!”.  We are made in his image.  So if we know we worked hard, and we did our best, I believe it is healthy to feel “it is good”!   My relationship with myself is greatly improved, and I am sewing again.  If we can possibly have a healthy esteem, we can then be healthy to be in a relationship with.  Our relationship with our mate, family, children, and work mates can be healthier if we are more positive to be around.  By having a healthier diet and exercise program, a healthy attitude, we can have healthier expectations of others too.  Nurture those relationships respectfully.  Each person is subject to the law, and each person is protected by the law.  If that is remembered, then abuse would be uncommon.

Last night I saw true love.  A couple with their toddler entered the diner  where we were enjoying a meal.  The man was lovingly affectionate and obviously proud of his lady and the child.  He was quite handsome.  She was quite obese and unkempt.  It likely had been a hard day for her.  Yet, this man loved this woman, and she knew it.  I was greatly touched.

3.  Domestic, no I am not talking about domestic beer.  It is where we live, what we drive, and where we spend our time, and how we manage it all.  Half the year is gone, there is some warm weather maintenance we can do on our home, car, and property.  Have you made your punch list?  I want to get into the car and do some deep cleaning, and it is not just because I turned a to-go container of spaghetti upside down in the back seat of the car yesterday.  I was already planning on a thorough detail clean of the interior of the car, now it just seems more immediate to do.  Thankfully, my caring husband got the spaghetti spill cleaned up, but I do feel I need to do that thorough cleaning in the next day or so.  Light colored car, little spots could be anywhere.  This time of year is a great time to clean the garage, and have a garage sale or donate your goods.  Fix your bicycles and use them.  Plan a trip to the zoo, or keep cool in a museum, visit family, or go away for a long weekend.

John got some weatherstripping done on all the doors last week.  Our lovely old yellow cat, PUFF, has already scratched up the new weatherstrip on the front door.  I am going to do a smelly hairspray on the lower door frames after I rub a little essential oils on the weatherstrip.  We still need to get some exterior painting done.  There is a list.  I am eager to get the windows clean.  As I am zeroing in on a room at a time with the deep cleaning,  the last thing I do in the room, the final touch is cleaning all the glass, which includes the windows.  Doesn’t it make everything look good.?

Attention to these three areas can give pretty quick improvement in many areas of our life. We can already feel better about this year and all we hoped to achieve.  We live in a very demanding and often insecure world.  Gently, yet, effectivly gaining more control over our health, relationships, and domestic situation can give us a sense of accomplishment resulting in a healthier esteem.  June may be gone by,…we still have a half year to fulfill our goals.

 

 

 

 

 

TIME Limits.

Time limits, what does that mean? It means establishing a block of time for a certain activity at an appointed time.  Then fearlessly just do it.  Easy to say.

Think about the one thing you do not like to do.  Something you procrastinate.

A person, I did not expect to see that their car is cluttered with soda bottles, fast food wrappers, and other things scattered about the vehicle.  I asked her, “Why is it so hard for you to clean out your car?”  She said “I live in my car”.  I cannot help but think, then why not keep it nice for yourself.

I suggested to this young person that they make a day once a week before they go to work in the afternoon, to leave about 40 minutes early, get the car washed, go take the trash out and use the vacuum that is free, and then get the car fueled.  Go inside and have a snack before work.  She said she might try it.

Being that I use to have the same problem, and it can still be a problem if I am not careful.  My husband is a great influence because he likes a clean car.  I do too.

A different problem I had was being overly stressed when needing to make phone calls and or handle mail which required an action.  It was detrimental the way I handled it in my thirties.  What was I thinking when I would just shove my unopened mail in a three foot long drawer in the kitchen.  I was in my thirties then with three small sons and a job that required a lot of hours.  With the boys homework and extracurricular activities, and my college homework, and work, life was very overwhelming at times.  When the power went out, I would fish around in this long drawer looking for any mail from the power company.  My ex husband was not paying child support at the time and life was so hard pressed.  I feel great sympathy for single parents with many responsibilities. When family pitch in and help where they can, the mother can have free time to do bills and clean the home.

What has been working for me is I have a personal rule that I make all necessary phone calls before 11 a.m.  I make the phone calls then so it cannot get put off to another day.  If I did it in the afternoon, some companies close at 4 p.m., depending on their time zone it is earlier.  Lunch time calls are not always good because others are taking lunch too and you may not get the party you need.  There are some companies that close on a Friday afternoon.  Calling by 11 a.m. is a rule that prevents me from procrastinating.

Anxiety can cause imagined unlikely troubles, sometimes I still do it.   It is awful anxiety that I feel, and it can be unrealistic to assume that I would be tied up on the phone for a couple hours.  Many feel that way too.  Or concern that I would not be able to answer the questions.

By appointing a time limit to start something, and estimating the time it should take, it is a nice surprise when we get it done faster than assumed.  The reward is that it is done.  I like to write in my calendar what time I called, whom I talked to, how long the call took, and what is the anticipated results.  This helps me so much.

I am striving to figure out my July calendar of domestic events.  I love the zone method a popular domestic authority established.  One week per area of home gets a special deep cleaning all week.  Imagine if a person was done in three days.  It takes a job per day.  I like the program.

Creating my master list to finish some things that have been lagging on.  The nagging of my mind when I see such makes it impossible to feel peace.  Knowing I am getting more done and I am getting acclimated to the routine gives me encouragement to continue on.  They say, practice makes perfect.  I do not want to be perfect, just greatly improved.    My Master List is a form of establishing time limits.  Because with the master list, I know what is my priority.  It feels goo to see how many I can get ticked off early in the week.  I am eager to see the week where I get it all done early, if that happens I can look at my master monthly list and see what I can get done.  When I have to rest extra, this method helps me to keep from getting overwhelmed.  Of course, I am not an expert, my home is still in a state of recovery and remodeling.  It is just getting better.

The weekend, I did not finish anything I strove to work on last week.  It was an unusual weekend, and we were able to enjoy friends, and get some needed rest.  When things seem out of your control, we can just relax, enjoy it, and get back on track on Monday.  Time Limits can help us to accomplish more on our priority list.

Start One or Finish One.

This is the question when desiring to start a new project.   Some people are great at being productive. They tend to be neater and more organized. That is just my personal observation of my other creative buddies whom seem to complete an enjoy their project.  They seem to have the ability to focus on the anticipated outcome, and they keep working.

Then there are others like me whom get so enthusiastic about a project. I get so excited an can think of nothing else. In my mind I analyze all aspects of a project. It takes time an money.   Later when working on the project which may be 75% or greater completed, I hit a snag or difficulty then it gets set aside with the optimism that I will get back to it.   It becomes a part of my project graveyard.  What I have not said is that my mind has been excited about a new project planning out all the details.  It continues on until a new snag then a new project. ..a very unsatisfying cycle.

Solution I have been employing.  First I realize I may never be able to fuction at the productive level as some of my friends. Secondly I know myself I have to strike while the iron is hot before the enthusiasm wanes.   Learning a bit about the reasons behind my habits or lack thereof, I am using the first week of a month an the last week of the month which gives me two weeks to pull out a few near done projects and to complete them one at a time. Seeing a few things done, a new enthusium sets in, What was I waiting for? That was a great item to make. Now I am enjoying the satisfaction of success and clearing away a little more from that project graveyard.

I make a master list of all the steps of my project an if I come up with a new project I will go ahead an make a few notes on the new project so when I am finished with current project I can know I have not lost any important creative details I dreamed up.  The boredom I have while in the middle of a project is very strange to me, part of me is elated by seeing that my idea worked an I am content even without finished product, yet, I am not capable physically of going as fast as I would like to go. What only took an afternoon years ago, now takes me little bits of time over a few weeks.   However, I am delighted with the final product.  Today I am sewing on five buttons to a charming collared blouse I made for a skirt I made last fall.  The outfit is made from scarfs I purchased, a beautiful lightweight cotton voile. If I am well on Sunday, I will wear my new outfit to the meeting.

Treasuring the blessings of commitment, I will no longer let myself give up so easily just because of occosionally running into a little difficulty.